Announcement

Collapse

Forum Rules (Everyone Must Read!!!)

1] What you CAN NOT post.

You agree, through your use of this service, that you will not use this forum to post any material which is:
- abusive
- vulgar
- hateful
- harassing
- personal attacks
- obscene

You also may not:
- post images that are too large (max is 500*500px)
- post any copyrighted material unless the copyright is owned by you or cited properly.
- post in UPPER CASE, which is considered yelling
- post messages which insult the Armenians, Armenian culture, traditions, etc
- post racist or other intentionally insensitive material that insults or attacks another culture (including Turks)

The Ankap thread is excluded from the strict rules because that place is more relaxed and you can vent and engage in light insults and humor. Notice it's not a blank ticket, but just a place to vent. If you go into the Ankap thread, you enter at your own risk of being clowned on.
What you PROBABLY SHOULD NOT post...
Do not post information that you will regret putting out in public. This site comes up on Google, is cached, and all of that, so be aware of that as you post. Do not ask the staff to go through and delete things that you regret making available on the web for all to see because we will not do it. Think before you post!


2] Use descriptive subject lines & research your post. This means use the SEARCH.

This reduces the chances of double-posting and it also makes it easier for people to see what they do/don't want to read. Using the search function will identify existing threads on the topic so we do not have multiple threads on the same topic.

3] Keep the focus.

Each forum has a focus on a certain topic. Questions outside the scope of a certain forum will either be moved to the appropriate forum, closed, or simply be deleted. Please post your topic in the most appropriate forum. Users that keep doing this will be warned, then banned.

4] Behave as you would in a public location.

This forum is no different than a public place. Behave yourself and act like a decent human being (i.e. be respectful). If you're unable to do so, you're not welcome here and will be made to leave.

5] Respect the authority of moderators/admins.

Public discussions of moderator/admin actions are not allowed on the forum. It is also prohibited to protest moderator actions in titles, avatars, and signatures. If you don't like something that a moderator did, PM or email the moderator and try your best to resolve the problem or difference in private.

6] Promotion of sites or products is not permitted.

Advertisements are not allowed in this venue. No blatant advertising or solicitations of or for business is prohibited.
This includes, but not limited to, personal resumes and links to products or
services with which the poster is affiliated, whether or not a fee is charged
for the product or service. Spamming, in which a user posts the same message repeatedly, is also prohibited.

7] We retain the right to remove any posts and/or Members for any reason, without prior notice.


- PLEASE READ -

Members are welcome to read posts and though we encourage your active participation in the forum, it is not required. If you do participate by posting, however, we expect that on the whole you contribute something to the forum. This means that the bulk of your posts should not be in "fun" threads (e.g. Ankap, Keep & Kill, This or That, etc.). Further, while occasionally it is appropriate to simply voice your agreement or approval, not all of your posts should be of this variety: "LOL Member213!" "I agree."
If it is evident that a member is simply posting for the sake of posting, they will be removed.


8] These Rules & Guidelines may be amended at any time. (last update September 17, 2009)

If you believe an individual is repeatedly breaking the rules, please report to admin/moderator.
See more
See less

My ChildHood Dream!

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • My ChildHood Dream!

    You see, ever since I was a kid, choking other kids with the yo-yo string and/or inserting matches in electric outlets, while occasionally taking a pause to enjoy some of the fruity flavors of Squeeze It's and Teddy Grahams while watching Power Rangers, I have always been fascinated by moustaches and beards. Ever since I saw that episode of Beavis and Butthead, in which they watched an 80s movie and saw how hot beards were and that it attracts chicks, and decided to cut their hair and super glue it to their face, I pictured myself as an emaciated pseudo intellectual with glasses and a beard in front of the radio on the AM airwaves boring people over 40 to their deaths, sort of like this guy, but the only chicks I would attract are women over 40 who like Opera and have cats ( I hate cats ).


    "Did you people know the fascinating fact that all governments are a monopoly of force in a given territory?"

    But anyway, beyond that I have always been intruiged by the truly godawful event every year, and which is almost upon us.



    You see, people from around the world gather together to compete in a very tough teeth grinding, stomach churning, and yawn inducing contest that involves wit, sweat, and some dazzling grooming habits of thy facial hair that you wont see anywhere else.

    You see, ever since I was a kid, I've wanted to be in this international event, to make my life seem more fullfilling. And sadly, again, this year, in spite of my qualifications I was not asked to be a judge. I don't get it, because honestly, I have what it takes. I have an appreciation for beards and moustaches and a forest fire of a desire to judge people's beards and moustaches. Ever since I was a kid I knew that I would one day be a world renowned beard and moustache critic. All I knew is that one day my words would be the force that makes or breaks people with facial hair. "Boris, your beard sucks, to the plucking machine you go!".

    While circumstances have led me astray from my early childhood dreams, I have not forgotten them. Also, I can relate to these competitors. I have a bond with them in the form of facial hair. While I don't personally have a beard or moustache, I often go weeks without shaving because of extreme laziness and a desire to look like a disheveled hobo. However, I have spent the great deal of my young adult life reading and re-reading this marvelous website.



    Feel free to talk about your childhood dreams that have never come to fruition because of some bad bad destiny!
    Achkerov kute.

  • #2
    I always wanted to be 140 pounds...

    Comment


    • #3
      With the amount of carbohydrates and fatty acids these days a 140 lbs shouldn't be too hard of a goal to attain. My prayers are with you my child.

      I also have to apologize. I totally forgot there are females on this forum. This is about beards and moustaches. While I don't understand what it's like, I sympathize with the plight women face knowing that you will never be able to have something as wondrous as a beard or a moustache, to be able to let a simple patch of stubble grow into a living breathing monument, to give life where there is none. I only hope your petty womanly jealousy does not fill you with anger, blinding you from appreciating a quality beard or moustache.

      However, it should be noted, for record purposes, that goats are not humans, and goats also have beards. What makes goats unique is even the females have a beard!




      Goat fact #1: Both male and female goats can have beards!

      Goat fact #2: Goats don't have any upper front teeth!
      Achkerov kute.

      Comment


      • #4
        then they should be good french kissers.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by fIReBuRntInHeLL
          then they should be good french kissers.
          They'd suck yer tongue right in, like a vacuum sucking in a hairball ( most probably a hairball that was created by someone who had a beard and was shedding his hair ).
          Achkerov kute.

          Comment


          • #6
            They dont need tongue anyways, all they say is "mehehehhe mehehehe"

            hold on, is it mehheehe or behhhhehehehee?

            Comment


            • #7
              The real reason why I watched Looney Tunes so religiously was because of Yosemite Sam! He was a real bad ass with a beard and moustache and kicked ass ( despite being a midget )! I sat there hypnotized watching it, my jaw dropped and a saliva puddle forming on the carpet below me of where I sat and watched.

              Achkerov kute.

              Comment


              • #8
                I loved this character, because he looked like rabiz short red-bearded armenian mafioz.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by fIReBuRntInHeLL
                  I loved this character, because he looked like rabiz short red-bearded armenian mafioz.
                  Yes, and he's not the only famous character sportin a beard and a moustache. Our, good ole buddy Saddam, whom we put in power and financed, and then declared our own enemy, also had a nice beard and a moustache, and the pictures below show all the difference between excellent and not so excellent grooming habits, it most certainly affects our moods.



                  Achkerov kute.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Goats say "meh" and sheep say "beh" I believe.

                    Nice pics. I am not a big fan of facial hair. Although it seems to be working for Saddam...do they not let the man shave now? That would be just wrong.

                    Comment

                    Working...
                    X