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Joke

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  • #11
    A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.

    She was a very good-looking woman, and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

    Two men applied for the job.

    One was gay and the other a drunk.

    She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.

    He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.

    For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.

    Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town an kick up your heels."

    The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

    One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return.

    Two o'clock, and no hired hand.

    He returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

    She quietly called him over to her.

    "Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.

    Trembling, he did as she directed.

    "Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

    "Now take off my socks."

    He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

    "Now take off my skirt."

    He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

    "Now take off my bra."

    Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

    "Now," she said, "take off my panties."

    By the light of the fire, he slowly pulled them down and off.

    Then she looked at him and said, "If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired!!!

    Comment

    • #12
      Originally posted by Harut82
      A penguin was driving through Arizona on a hot, summer Sunday when he noticed his oil light was on.

      He got out of the car and, sure enough, it was leaking oil all over the road.

      The penguin drove around the corner to a service station and asked the mechanic to take a look at it.

      The mechanic said he had a few others to look at first but if he came back in an hour he could tell the penguin what was wrong with his car.

      The penguin agreed and went for a walk.

      He found an ice-cream shop and thought a big bowl of vanilla ice cream would really hit the spot, since he was a penguin and it was Arizona in the summer, after all.

      He sat down at the counter and started in on his ice cream.

      Of course he had no hands so it was rather messy.

      By the time he was done he had ice cream all over his flippers, and his mouth was a total mess.

      He walked back to the service station and said to the mechanic, "Did you find out what is wrong with my car?"

      The mechanic replied, "It looks like you've blown a seal."

      "No no," said the penguin. "It's just ice cream."

      http://photos.imageevent.com/frankin...MonkeyJoke.wmv
      this post = teh win.

      Comment

      • #13
        Originally posted by Seapahn
        http://photos.imageevent.com/frankin...MonkeyJoke.wmv
        nice find

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