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Need some relationship advice.

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  • #1

    Need some relationship advice.

    Ive been with my gf for the last 2 1/2yrs. everything is goin good for us, but i recenty moved to Arizona and now we are about 350 miles apart. i just found out today that over the weekend she told me sthat she was gonna be out with her friends. she didnt come home friday till 2:30am and she came home on saturday at 1:30 am . she told me she was out with her friends at the movies and bowling, but when i started asking her more detailed questions she came out and told me, that over the weekend shes been dating one of her co-workers and she was out with him those night when she came home late. And now shes telling me she needs a break from our relationship so she can go out with this guy and see what happens with them.
    after 2 1/2 yrs she wants to cheat on me with some lil mexican border hopper and she has the nere to call me and lie to me and tell me she wants a break. I also made airline reservations to go see her in 2 weeks and i got my hotel and my rental car all waiting for me when i get to LA.

    So this is where i come to u my fellow armenians. What the hell should i do? i am so confuzed on what to do, i love here very much but i cant be with someone if they are cheating on me and lying to me about it. Please respond and help me out.

    Thx
    Andre
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Re: Need some relationship advice.

    Originally posted by Dre24
    but i cant be with someone if they are cheating on me and lying to me about it. Please respond and help me out
    That is your answer there. If your intuition and feelings are telling you to leave, do it. Only you know what is best for you. I never could understand why people choose to cheat on their partners. I have never done it, but in every relationship I have been in they have cheated on me. Anyways, list the pros and the cons of your relationship. You said you love her, but if the reasons you love her suddenly seem diminished because of her actions I think you need to look at your relationship a little more deeply. Love isnt something to be played around with. If her feelings were mutual she wouldnt think of anyone else but you. I want to say leave her, make her understand what she lost and perhaps she will learn, but I am a very forgiving person and believe that if she were to change than it is workable. But she stated she wants a break. A break is usually when two people dont see other people and take time to reflect on their relationship. She isnt doing that, she already has plans to see someone else. Its decieving. I say speak your peace and leave her. FInd someone who truley appreciates you and what you have to offer.

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    • #3
      Re: Need some relationship advice.

      Sounds to me like she doesn't want a long distance relationship with you (if at all), and can't say I blame her (unless you know when/if you'll move back and you have told her). So you have to talk to her ... either she moves out to AZ with you, you move back, she waits, or you break up.

      She has already told you basically that she's not going to wait (again, unless she doesn't know if/when you are moving back). If she's Armenian, moving out with you might be rather complicated if you are not getting married due to her family etc. If you are not moving back, and she is not moving out to AZ, then you have no choice but to break up.

      As far as flight and rental car ... small peanuts compared to the big picture here so I wouldn't stress about those. The car you can cancel but the flight you are stuck with.
      this post = teh win.

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      • #4
        Re: Need some relationship advice.

        Originally posted by sad_eyes
        I never could understand why people choose to cheat on their partners.
        It could have many reasons ... lust, sex, greed, curiosity, revenge, bad judgement ... you name it. Unfortunatley, all of those are human traits and not everyone can be expected to be "above" all that. So people will cheat given the right circumstances. But everyone is different so what exactly those circumstances are will differ. Also, different people have different understanding of what a monogamous relationship is and what is cheating (especially true if there is no marriage since after marriage, there is little question about what is "cheating" ... at least in the physical sense )
        this post = teh win.

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        • #5
          Re: Need some relationship advice.

          Originally posted by Sip
          It could have many reasons ... lust, sex, greed, curiosity, revenge, bad judgement ... you name it. Unfortunatley, all of those are human traits and not everyone can be expected to be "above" all that. So people will cheat given the right circumstances. But everyone is different so what exactly those circumstances are will differ. Also, different people have different understanding of what a monogamous relationship is and what is cheating (especially true if there is no marriage since after marriage, there is little question about what is "cheating" ... at least in the physical sense )
          I agree with what you've said. I'm also curious, Sip. Are you "above" all that?

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          • #6
            Re: Need some relationship advice.

            Of course not ... there are definitely circumstances under which I might cheat. For example, if the faith of the universe depended on it ...
            this post = teh win.

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            • #7
              Re: Need some relationship advice.

              Originally posted by Sip
              Of course not ... there are definitely circumstances under which I might cheat. For example, if the faith of the universe depended on it ...
              Faith or fate?

              The three monotheistic religions and the two main Eastern ones will give up all hope unless you sleep around.
              Last edited by Quarteria; 05-22-2006, 08:47 PM.

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              • #8
                Re: Need some relationship advice.

                I said FAITH Works either way
                this post = teh win.

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                • #9
                  Re: Need some relationship advice.

                  Originally posted by Sip
                  Of course not ... there are definitely circumstances under which I might cheat. For example, if the faith of the universe depended on it ...
                  You saw the question.
                  Last edited by Anahita; 05-22-2006, 08:53 PM.

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                  • #10
                    Re: Need some relationship advice.

                    Originally posted by Sip
                    I said FAITH Works either way
                    Just checking and plaudits.

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