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Today me and a friend of mine got into a discussion about the idea of "home"... what it really means. It all started because of a conversation in the film "Garden State." For those of you who haven't seen it, here's the transcript:
Andrew: You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone.
Sam: I still feel at home in my house.
Andrew Largeman: You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this right of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for you kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place.
this is the conversation as it went:
XXXXXXXXXX [12:59 AM]: have you ever heard a quote and been struck by how accurately it expresses something you've been feeling that you never tried to put into words before? a couple nights ago I watched the trailer for Garden State online since I keep reading about how great it is on all the blogs I read, and there was a quote in it that sums up something I've been dreading. it's part of the reason I've always made sure to spend every weekend and day off school at home. I've seen it happen to other people I know who've gone away to college, and I've been trying to make sure it never happens to me I never want to think of my home as "my parents' house" and not "my home"
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:02 AM]: but at the same time a part of you stays stagnent. You need to establish a home for yourself.
XXXXXXXXXX [1:04 AM]: but to me, a house is not a home without family. If I move out completely, my new place won't feel like a home until I have a family of my own in it. I don't want to get stuck between the two.
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:04 AM]: It's part of life. are you saying you want to live with your parents until the day you get married? A girl's not going to be attracted to someone like that... at least, not a girl that would respect you
XXXXXXXXXX [1:05 AM]: I know that's not the way it's going to happen, but it sure is the way I'd prefer it to happen. Still, the quote seems really relevant
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:07 AM]: I don't know, I've never had a strong feeling of "home"... maybe cause I've moved so much where as you were born and raised in the same house. My family could move somewhere else tomorrow and that place wouldn't be closer to my heart than anywhere else.
XXXXXXXXXX [1:08 AM]: the house is certainly a big part of it, 'cause I really love that house. But it's also the fact that my family lives there. I can't imagine coming home from school or work to a place and thinking "ah, it's good to be home" unless I have family living there with me
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:09 AM]: true. but still, the whole idea of "home" isn't one I'm concerned about. actaully, that's incorrect... it's probably the idea I'm most concerned about, but not in the traditional sense. but in any case... I don't really identify with that quote as much as you do.
In any case, later on the discussion came up with another friend who's currently in Israel and very home sick of the states, and this was the case I made for my idea of "home":
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:28 AM]: like I told Ari, I've never really had a strong sense of "home"... where as he's basically lived in the same house most of his life, I've moved a bunch of times and come from a divorced family... I've kinda considered myself my own home, and where ever I go, it's my home cause I'm there. But even then I consider it home only in a superficial sense. The only time I truly think I'll feel at home is if I go to Armenia. Here I live in houses not built by my people on land that has nothing to do with me... such is the nature of any group of people in a diaspora. So as far as I'm concered I live in a house, and that's that, and I could move someplace else tomorrow and that would be my new house, but it wouldn't be any more or less close to my heart as these four walls around me now. I think if I ever stepped foot on Armenian soil, it would be the first time I can take a breath and say, truly say, "I'm home."
anyway, I just felt that the idea of home and what it really means could be a good place to start for a philosophical discussion.
Andrew: You know that point in your life when you realize that the house that you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of the sudden even though you have some place where you can put your stuff that idea of home is gone.
Sam: I still feel at home in my house.
Andrew Largeman: You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day one day and it's just gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this right of passage, you know. You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for you kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place.
this is the conversation as it went:
XXXXXXXXXX [12:59 AM]: have you ever heard a quote and been struck by how accurately it expresses something you've been feeling that you never tried to put into words before? a couple nights ago I watched the trailer for Garden State online since I keep reading about how great it is on all the blogs I read, and there was a quote in it that sums up something I've been dreading. it's part of the reason I've always made sure to spend every weekend and day off school at home. I've seen it happen to other people I know who've gone away to college, and I've been trying to make sure it never happens to me I never want to think of my home as "my parents' house" and not "my home"
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:02 AM]: but at the same time a part of you stays stagnent. You need to establish a home for yourself.
XXXXXXXXXX [1:04 AM]: but to me, a house is not a home without family. If I move out completely, my new place won't feel like a home until I have a family of my own in it. I don't want to get stuck between the two.
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:04 AM]: It's part of life. are you saying you want to live with your parents until the day you get married? A girl's not going to be attracted to someone like that... at least, not a girl that would respect you
XXXXXXXXXX [1:05 AM]: I know that's not the way it's going to happen, but it sure is the way I'd prefer it to happen. Still, the quote seems really relevant
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:07 AM]: I don't know, I've never had a strong feeling of "home"... maybe cause I've moved so much where as you were born and raised in the same house. My family could move somewhere else tomorrow and that place wouldn't be closer to my heart than anywhere else.
XXXXXXXXXX [1:08 AM]: the house is certainly a big part of it, 'cause I really love that house. But it's also the fact that my family lives there. I can't imagine coming home from school or work to a place and thinking "ah, it's good to be home" unless I have family living there with me
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:09 AM]: true. but still, the whole idea of "home" isn't one I'm concerned about. actaully, that's incorrect... it's probably the idea I'm most concerned about, but not in the traditional sense. but in any case... I don't really identify with that quote as much as you do.
In any case, later on the discussion came up with another friend who's currently in Israel and very home sick of the states, and this was the case I made for my idea of "home":
Hye Jinx 1984 [1:28 AM]: like I told Ari, I've never really had a strong sense of "home"... where as he's basically lived in the same house most of his life, I've moved a bunch of times and come from a divorced family... I've kinda considered myself my own home, and where ever I go, it's my home cause I'm there. But even then I consider it home only in a superficial sense. The only time I truly think I'll feel at home is if I go to Armenia. Here I live in houses not built by my people on land that has nothing to do with me... such is the nature of any group of people in a diaspora. So as far as I'm concered I live in a house, and that's that, and I could move someplace else tomorrow and that would be my new house, but it wouldn't be any more or less close to my heart as these four walls around me now. I think if I ever stepped foot on Armenian soil, it would be the first time I can take a breath and say, truly say, "I'm home."
anyway, I just felt that the idea of home and what it really means could be a good place to start for a philosophical discussion.
) and the sharing the bathroom problem with my sisters gets hectic. But I love my family and I know they love me so home is the first place I think about and miss tremendously when I am not at home.
) where you actually belong to, or anyone that matters for you, it's just a place that matters for you. Your home could be anywhere, you just have to choose your right one
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