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To his million die hard crazy all the way fans he is suave, smooth and Swayze. To the rest of us he is Patrick."
There are many crazy people in the world and all over the interweb. Let's play a game, when I say "crazy" you say "Swayze". Okay cancel that it won't work. It's good to be a little crazy especially when it regards such historical prodigies of the television screen such as Patrick Swayze. Before Patrick Swayze entered what we now call "Hollywood" (it used to just be called "Wood" and from here on in this lovely thread it will be referred to as "Wood") films were still in black and white and actors and actresses refused to dance with each other much less kiss each other. Patrick Swayze revolutionized Wood. Patrick Swayze has done it all, lived it all, and drank it all because not only was he a damn good actor he was also an alcoholic (and you clearly cant be a good actor unless you abuse one of two substances either drugs or drinks). He has surfed, robbed banks, skydived, danced, has been a ghost, had sex, and was even a girl. He is the most accomplished actor evar! He even knows the touch of death
You're crazy if you touch me Swayze, my lawyers are standing by
According to the most recent study conducted by me while trying to open a box of Honey Bunches of Oats cereal (made by Post because they are the best) this morning in my kitchen there are a million people that are big die hard crazy all the way fans of Patrick Swayze because of his superb acting skills which captured and mesmerized audiences for a very long period of time which since the million people that were his fans all died because of chronic diarrhea in which their bowels were pooped out, Patrick Swayze's career of capturing and mesmerizing audiences was for a very short period of time.
Patrick Swayze used to have a mullet which forevar tainted his career in Wood
In his very big hit movie Point Break Patrick Swayze teamed up with Neo to offer action packed and suspenseful action by robbing banks, surfing, and skydiving which Patrick Swayze informs us is not a crazy thing to do, as anyone who clearly watched the movie can pick up as the moral of the movie. Most of the movie however was spent by Patrick Swayze teaching Neo how to surf and fly and to a lesser extent how to drink Armenian coffee and turn the cup over, which Neo would later use in the big hit movie The Matrix to battle Agent Smith. In a way if it weren't for Patrick Swayze (and soorch!), Neo would never have defeated Agent Smith, if not for anything else at least for this Patrick Swayze deserves an Oscar ( and if not an Oscar at least a FOscar).
'Hey Neo do you wanna learn how to surf?'
'Woah, yeah.'
Neo, someday you'll find this stuff useful
Woah
We also can't give a blind eye to his other performances which earned him notoriety as well as achieving what the Italian Renaissance termed the well rounded individual because he was so well rounded. During his career in Wood he also made a movie in which he danced called Dirty Dancing. He made females all over the world melt into ricotta cheese because of his smooth, suave, Swayzeness. The movie is called 'Dirty' because it really literally really truly was Dirty Dancing because Swayze had this bad habit of pouring sand into the woman's crotch as they danced and the friction caused by the womans legs rubbing against each other made the sand spread all over. Sadly, for these above reasons he only got a marginal role in Dirty Dancing Havana Nights serving Armenian coffee to the set.
"If I can teach Neo how to fly, I can teach you how to dance with sand in your crotch"
Patrick Swayze is not dead, but he was dead. Unlike all the other pretenders who call themselves 'actors' Patrick Swayze had a rare gift and he tapped into it. In one movie, Ghost he displayed the uncanny ability of dying and coming back to life after the movie. He showed us that yes there is life after death, and that yes, you can still make love, and that yes, you can still play with clay, but the only kick is you can never eat anything like dolma since you're a ghost.
OMG I'm scared. I'm Demi Moore and a ghost is making love to me. I better call The Ghostbuster to rescue me, NO WAIT, Ashton Kutcher to come rescue me
And lastly, Patrick Swayze's legacy would not have been what it is had he not engaged in a role in which he truly came in touch with this feminine side of the sexuality spectrum because he is smooth, suave, and Swayze. In To Wong Foo Patrick Swayze was a drag queen because evar since his mullet causing a slump in his career he was desperate (also because he is sensitive, smooth, suave, and Swayze).
Flowers? For meee? MY HEEERO!
VS 
If you were to ask me who would win in a battle to the death between Captain Planet and Patrick Swayze I would say Patrick Swayze because Captain Planet is so afraid of being gay he won't touch another man, whereas Patrick Swayze is so secure in his masculinity and sexuality he will gladly lick taint.
For all these reasons Patrick Swayze is a hall of famer in movies. There are many reasons why Patrick Swayze went from blockbuster to lackluster. If I could honestly say my opinion it's because he sucked, but since I can't (HA HA I ALREADY SAID IT, I AM SO FUNNY), I'll conjure up another reason why.
What did I do wrong? I need to call Neo, I taught him everything he knows and his career skyrocketed
It's because he's getting old. It used to be getting old was cool. Now there's absolutely no appeal in getting old. Everyone hates you. The only thing you pretty much look forward to is getting half-price discounts off of greasy, overpriced, sweating lump of carbon residue labeled "All American Slam" at Denny's. I bet that Patrick Swayze will one day be in a blockbuster hit movie but it won't be till he decides to transform himself to a ghost again. Poor guy. Till then, I will drink some soorch, turn my cup over, and try to read Patrick Swayze's future.
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