Betrayal

[sSsflamesSs]

Let's say in the near future, some closer than others, you finally find your significant other. You get married, the kids are on their way (well, if you want to breed, that is), and everything seems to be perfect. Then...dun, dun, dun...tragedy strikes and your life turns into xxxx. Why? Your soul mate decides that s/he needs a new kick in his/her life...s/he cheats...

So...which is worse for you (and you HAVE to pick one)...emotional or physical betrayal? Why?

Now, don't go all saying that you'd never forgive either choice. This is just a matter of what is more important to you. So pick the worst one of the two, and pour your heart out.

[jahannam]

definitely Emotional...
when the person in love with me decides to go out and have casual sex one day...I'd probably weep but I think it's fixable, since we're human... we make mistakes...
but when the person "in love with me" falls in love with someone else (which I"m guessing is the emotional cheaeting) that's not even a mistake... that's just the end of it... they don't have feelings for me anymore...

[Anonymouse]

Re: Betrayal

Let's say in the near future, some closer than others, you finally find your significant other. You get married, the kids are on their way (well, if you want to breed, that is), and everything seems to be perfect. Then...dun, dun, dun...tragedy strikes and your life turns into xxxx. Why? Your soul mate decides that s/he needs a new kick in his/her life...s/he cheats...

So...which is worse for you (and you HAVE to pick one)...emotional or physical betrayal? Why?

Now, don't go all saying that you'd never forgive either choice. This is just a matter of what is more important to you. So pick the worst one of the two, and pour your heart out.

This was a psychology question posed for a study. I remember that most women answered that they would rather their husbands be physically having an affair with someone, as opposed to emotionally, the men answered vice versa.

As for me, I believe both are important, and I won't lie this is my biggest fear, and as I'm sure everyone in their life questions their soul mate or imagines the unthinkable. We all hang by a thread and that fragile moment we must deal with in sacrificing ourselves to love.

Faithfulness is an admired thing, but nowadays it's not exactly practiced nor preached. Everyone seems to be more about themselves than anyone else. Sacrifice is non existent. This thought is a deep fear I have buried inside, I don't know about you. I've never had a girlfriend so I have no idea what it means to be emotionally attached to someone and if I do, I'm afraid of that gamble, that it will take toll on my soul.

For this reason I avoid anything serious. I probably suffer from paranoia.

Cheating, whether emotional or physical, is in my code of ethics, wrong. One spurns from the other. Where emotion ends, physicality takes over, where physicality begins is back with emotion. Emotion is in the mind, it breeds thought, and though breeds action. Our actions are tied to our character, we act how we are, how were bred to be, and how our characters were set to be by divine providence. Therefore, I PERSONALLY believe that these two are mutual and one stems from the other. You cannot cheat and just call it physical, for it is the emotion within that yurned for the physical.

Anyway, I talk too much and I am pretty buzzed and I believe half of that is rambling.

[surferarmo]

Both are bad. If I had to choose one, I would say emotional. I am not very emotional now, but I am sure that when I do find some chick worthy of a relationship, I will be emotionally attached, especially in marriage. To betray me, and especially the vows made before God, I take very seriously. I would not take it. I would grab my eight children and leave.
(We chose to breed...a lot.)

[sSsflamesSs]

Re: Betrayal

Cheating, whether emotional or physical, is in my code of ethics, wrong. One spurns from the other. Where emotion ends, physicality takes over, where physicality begins is back with emotion. Emotion is in the mind, it breeds thought, and though breeds action. Our actions are tied to our character, we act how we are, how were bred to be, and how our characters were set to be by divine providence. Therefore, I PERSONALLY believe that these two are mutual and one stems from the other. You cannot cheat and just call it physical, for it is the emotion within that yurned for the physical.

Although you are entitled to your personal opinion, so am I...and I disagree. Physical and emotional betrayal do not necessarily go hand in hand. Don't get me wrong...both are ethically wrong and unacceptable. Although they CAN coexist, one has the ability to exist without the other.

Physical betrayal, in my opinion, is the less severe of the two. I'm not saying that I would automatically forgive a physical affair...HELL NO. All I'm saying is that emotional betrayal is FAR worse, as jahannam mentioned.

Whether you agree or disagree, humans are animals. That's a fact. They might be the most dangerous and highly evolved animal on the planet, but they are still vulnerable to many flaws. Therefore, in the heat of passion, one might engage in an act that s/he will later live to regret (physical betrayal). Now, you can't possibly say that sex doesn't exist without love. To claim this is to say prostitution doesn't exist, as a rough example. The truth is, humans do engage in sex on the basis of animal instinct. Whether it's an impulsive thing, or simply being drunk off your ass, physical betrayal can occur without emotional betrayal. Also, physical betrayal can occur in a matter of minutes, and does not need much time to flourish and develop into a serious thing.

Emotional betrayal, on the other hand, takes time. It's not something that happens in an instant. It takes time to take form and is therefore more complex and unacceptable. Like jahannam said, emotional betrayal is the end of it. You've hit rock bottom and have nowhere else to go.

[surferarmo]

Very good point and articlated very well. In the question you asked if it was your soul mate, someone whom you are spiritually connected with. Emotional would definetly be the worst. Emotional betrayal is not only betraying the physical person, but betraying a covenant with the almighty. Emotional betrayal involves lies, and because emotional betrayal deals with spirituality, you lie to the soul which is connected with God. Or for those who dont believe, a higher power, or something more special.

[Anonymouse]

Perhaps I wasn't clear. My point was that emotional and physical betrayal are one in the same thing because it takes a certain amount of emotion for a person to have ( xxxxx ) to resort to the physical. If your spouse cheated on you with another person purely for physical pleasure, that physical pleasure he craved only derived from his emotional side, to satisfy those deep rooted and subconscious emotional yurnings. That was all.

[jahannam]

Anon...I think you totally changed what you had to say after being attacked by Flames ....
but I still love u! :twisted:

[Anonymouse]

How did I change what I said? I'm still saying the same thing, that both are tied in to each other and there is only one form of betrayal. I'm still sticking to the same position. Perhaps if you point out the discrepancy Ill admit.

[TVAdict710]

Re: Betrayal

Anyway, I talk too much and I am pretty buzzed and I believe half of that is rambling.

i heartily agree.