Even Better Than A
Schindler's List - Holocaust Mania
By Jason Roth
Save The Humans.com
3-24-4
What we need is a 24-hour Holocaust channel. Five Oscar-nominated Holocaust movies a year isn't enough. We need 365 days a year of Holocaust movies. With Holocaust commercials. For things like Holocaust theme parks, Holocaust dance clubs, and Holocaust-flavored breakfast cereals.
Just to make sure we don't forget the Holocaust, we should tattoo the word "Holocaust" underneath the eyelids of newborn babies. For little boys, a Holocaust ceremony could replace circumcision. It could be the "Holocausting", followed by a ceremonial viewing of the Holocaust memorial video, followed by a drive back home over the Holocaust Memorial Bridge. To hurry home and eat the turkey. Cooked "Holocaust style", of course.
We need Holocaust Awareness Educational Facilities. Not schools, where you learn how to add and spell, but places where you learn all about the Holocaust. At lunch, kids could be locked in the cafeteria, and cartoon animals could reenact the Holocaust. Kids could play Holocaust games. They could invite each other to Holocaust-themed birthday parties. They could take home Holocaust goodie bags, and go home, eat dinner, and have just enough time to do their Holocaust homework for Holocaust History.
We could make laws to force us to remember the Holocaust. We could throw everyone in a gas chamber if they forget the Holocaust. We could throw everyone in a gas chamber if they remember the Holocaust. (Just so they don't forget the Holocaust.)
We could have miniature Holocausts within the Holocaust, so no one forgets why we're having another Holocaust. If anyone escapes from one of the miniature Holocausts inside the big Holocaust, we could throw them back in the miniature Holocaust, or just leave them outside in the big Holocaust.
We could have competing Holocausts. We could have Holocaust superbowls, where Holocausts vie against other Holocausts for Holocaust world championships.
We could build Holocaust societies, and even alternate Holocaust realities, where Holocausts walk around, have jobs, and die in the Holocaust.
Here's another idea:
If you're going to make me relive the Holocaust, at least give me a fragment of understanding that will help me prevent it from happening again.
Schindler's List - Holocaust Mania
By Jason Roth
Save The Humans.com
3-24-4
What we need is a 24-hour Holocaust channel. Five Oscar-nominated Holocaust movies a year isn't enough. We need 365 days a year of Holocaust movies. With Holocaust commercials. For things like Holocaust theme parks, Holocaust dance clubs, and Holocaust-flavored breakfast cereals.
Just to make sure we don't forget the Holocaust, we should tattoo the word "Holocaust" underneath the eyelids of newborn babies. For little boys, a Holocaust ceremony could replace circumcision. It could be the "Holocausting", followed by a ceremonial viewing of the Holocaust memorial video, followed by a drive back home over the Holocaust Memorial Bridge. To hurry home and eat the turkey. Cooked "Holocaust style", of course.
We need Holocaust Awareness Educational Facilities. Not schools, where you learn how to add and spell, but places where you learn all about the Holocaust. At lunch, kids could be locked in the cafeteria, and cartoon animals could reenact the Holocaust. Kids could play Holocaust games. They could invite each other to Holocaust-themed birthday parties. They could take home Holocaust goodie bags, and go home, eat dinner, and have just enough time to do their Holocaust homework for Holocaust History.
We could make laws to force us to remember the Holocaust. We could throw everyone in a gas chamber if they forget the Holocaust. We could throw everyone in a gas chamber if they remember the Holocaust. (Just so they don't forget the Holocaust.)
We could have miniature Holocausts within the Holocaust, so no one forgets why we're having another Holocaust. If anyone escapes from one of the miniature Holocausts inside the big Holocaust, we could throw them back in the miniature Holocaust, or just leave them outside in the big Holocaust.
We could have competing Holocausts. We could have Holocaust superbowls, where Holocausts vie against other Holocausts for Holocaust world championships.
We could build Holocaust societies, and even alternate Holocaust realities, where Holocausts walk around, have jobs, and die in the Holocaust.
Here's another idea:
If you're going to make me relive the Holocaust, at least give me a fragment of understanding that will help me prevent it from happening again.
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