does age matter?

[Siamanto]

Re: does age matter?

I <3 Cougars ...

I <3 cats....

seriously I think older women are totally slept on by most men. There are a bunch of hotter older women who are single and looking for a younger relationship to feel younger again. What's wrong with that?

First of all, as long as both sides are consenting, can there be anything wrong in giving/sharing love and affection?

Second of all, not all older women involved with younger men are cougars as it is the case in "The Graduate" and "Teorema."
In an earlier post, I have referred to Fassbinder's "Fear Eats The Soul" where a younger man and older woman share love and affection.
Also, in "La peite Lili" - that I have mentioned earlier - the "older" woman who makes the above mentioned "unfair" comment about younger women, marries a young movie maker for his passion, intransigence and the sincerity of his beliefs; after, Lili, the younger woman leaves him for an older man.
In other words, an older woman can offer more than what a cougar is willing to offer to a younger man.
What do you mean by "hot?" Maybe I misunderstood you.

For the record, as I see it, the "eternal child" is neither hot nor cool; the "eternal child" is warm and warmth is what we feel around children

They, older women, know what they want and are a million times more stable than girls 21-30 imo.

There's a thin line between being alive and being unstable and, often, that thin line is nothing but a perception. Adults may be (emotionally) unstable as well; for instance, in "Lolita," "Pretty Baby" and "Baby Doll" the relationship failed because of the emotional unstability and pathological insecurity of the older man.
Also, stability may come with a price tag; all depends on one's priorities and appreciation.

[Siamanto]

Re: does age matter?

Dear Siamanto:

What a wonderful list!!! It's great and I just made a copy of it so I'll look at it every now and then and be reminded by it. See, I told you I will learn a great deal from you myself, I was right! I have seen your few posts and I know the knowledge you possess along with good writing abilities.

Anosuh,
Many Thanks! Maybe, I should read it myself, from time to time.
Reading your posts, I'm really pleased to see an Armenian woman daring to express her dissonance - yet sounds harmonious; instead of, such as many, hiding behind a wall of silence until the child inside dies or falls into oblivion.

Thank you! And I understand where you're coming from speaking about possessing the abilities to be an "eternal child". The child within is thruthful, usually speaks naturally, have the vitality and the youthfullness that sometimes grown ups would forget their initial steps that they used to take to view life in its beautiful simplicity that doesn't know how to lie (except trivial lies), how to cheat and be devious, malicious, harmful and poisonous to his/her own kind; but be himself or her wonderful self.

You're welcome!
Why do you think children are so beautiful? Why do you think the child inside dies? I have my views on it, but are we digressing???

P.S. LOL Does the "child" in Eternal Child means that age matters? Or does the "eternal" means that age does not matter?

[Lamb Boy]

Re: does age matter?

I <3 Cougars ... seriously I think older women are totally slept on by most men. There are a bunch of hotter older women who are single and looking for a younger relationship to feel younger again. What's wrong with that?

They, older women, know what they want and are a million times more stable than girls 21-30 imo. I wouldn't take this idea too far but 50ish could be possible if they took care of themselves. Now there are even more fishies in the seas! Yea! heh heh

[Anoush]

Re: does age matter?

You're welcome!

I just finished watching an interview with Brigitte Bardot where the interviewer used the expression "eternal child" to describe more or less what I had in mind. Also, I remembered that, a while ago, I made a list that can be considered as characteristics of the "eternal child???" Unfortunately - or fortunately??? - the list is "raw" - i.e. not organized or structured and not eloquent enough. I don't know if, today, I would express myself using the exact same words; but, the differences - if any - would be minimal and non-essential. Click here for the list!

Dear Siamanto:

What a wonderful list!!! It's great and I just made a copy of it so I'll look at it every now and then and be reminded by it. See, I told you I will learn a great deal from you myself, I was right! I have seen your few posts and I know the knowledge you possess along with good writing abilities.

Thank you! And I understand where you're coming from speaking about possessing the abilities to be an "eternal child". The child within is thruthful, usually speaks naturally, have the vitality and the youthfullness that sometimes grown ups would forget their initial steps that they used to take to view life in its beautiful simplicity that doesn't know how to lie (except trivial lies), how to cheat and be devious, malicious, harmful and poisonous to his/her own kind; but be himself or her wonderful self.

[Siamanto]

Re: does age matter?

Well thank you Siamanto very much! I haven't had such a nice complement for a long time.

You made my evening and I am sure I will learn a great deal from you myself.

You're welcome!

I just finished watching an interview with Brigitte Bardot where the interviewer used the expression "eternal child" to describe more or less what I had in mind. Also, I remembered that, a while ago, I made a list that can be considered as characteristics of the "eternal child???" Unfortunately - or fortunately??? - the list is "raw" - i.e. not organized or structured and not eloquent enough. I don't know if, today, I would express myself using the exact same words; but, the differences - if any - would be minimal and non-essential. Click here for the list!

[Anoush]

Re: does age matter?

I basically agree with you and even if I "add??" anything to your description of the "rest of the package," I would be saying more or less the same with different words, in different ways, emphasizing on different details, with a different style. However, I would simply add that my focus was not limited to the "20-ish some year old," because there exists younger women who can offer the same.








I apologize if my post gave you the wrong impression, but, for the record, I did not mean to say or suggest that your post was not a pertinent reply to the question "whether an older woman should or would have a relationship or a marriage with a younger man and if that was OK;" my focus was different and I just wanted to ask you a somehow related question that, yes, you have answered above.

I asked you the question because you seem to be a person who dares looking at the world as it is - and takes the time to do so, a person who dares to have her own views - and takes the time to develop them, a person who dares to express them in public - and takes the time to articulate them.

Well thank you Siamanto very much! I haven't had such a nice complement for a long time.

You made my evening and I am sure I will learn a great deal from you myself.

[Siamanto]

Re: does age matter?

Yes, I reread your question and basically you're asking whether a 20-ish some year old has only to offer a "good skin or a pretty face".

No, obviously not. It's all relevant to the 20-ish year old girl in question and what kind of attributes that particular girl/woman has to offer; an intelligent and a sharp brain, great talents, premature wisdom, education, abilities to interact successfuly and well with people, patience with children, a great love and a heart in her bosom and the list could go on and on. But if we take a concensus and somewhat generalize of 20-ish young women, other than their young and firm skin, beautiful face, young and a healthy blood; a young woman can offer youthful passions and the love of enjoyment and an overall fulfillment of life. Youthful good health that comes with a young body, a psychological (firstness, first experiences) and the bewilderment of that initial experiments of life that makes a person feel very special on that first and utmost experiences in life. As children do in the first stages of their life as first experiences do become very special for them. A first time loving and sex if that applies, etc. etc.

You can add if you wish or anything else that comes to mind.

Again, other than what I have mentioned above, it is all relevant to the individual's upbringing, education, nurturing from their families, and their own gifted talents if they have any, positive feelings (kindness or otherwise) etc. etc. etc.

I basically agree with you and even if I "add??" anything to your description of the "rest of the package," I would be saying more or less the same with different words, in different ways, emphasizing on different details, with a different style. However, I would simply add that my focus was not limited to the "20-ish some year old," because there exists younger women who can offer the same.

I believe the conversations revolved or actually was questioned whether an older woman should or would have a relationship or a marriage with a younger man and if that was OK. In view of that question, I gave the attributes only of the older woman; because the relevant question asked was about an older woman versus a young man.

I see that now you are turning the question towards the 20-ish and the younger woman's attributes. Well then you can see my answer on that as well above.

You are welcomed. As I said above, the topic in question was merely about an older woman getting into a relationship with a younger man. Therefore I obviously stressed on the older women's attributes; but yes younger women could and would offer many attributes as I have mentioned above.

I apologize if my post gave you the wrong impression, but, for the record, I did not mean to say or suggest that your post was not a pertinent reply to the question "whether an older woman should or would have a relationship or a marriage with a younger man and if that was OK;" my focus was different and I just wanted to ask you a somehow related question that, yes, you have answered above.

I asked you the question because you seem to be a person who dares looking at the world as it is - and takes the time to do so, a person who dares to have her own views - and takes the time to develop them, a person who dares to express them in public - and takes the time to articulate them.

[Anoush]

Re: does age matter?

I agree that physical appearance - or what I call "Eye Vitamin" - is of relevance but, my question was not "What is relevant and what is not in a relationship?" or "Whether physical appearance is more - or less - important than 'the rest of the package' in a relationship?" That is a legitimate topic in itself that we will probably touch a bit later.
I'm sorry if my question did not seem clear enough.

Yes, I reread your question and basically you're asking whether a 20-ish some year old has only to offer a "good skin or a pretty face".

No, obviously not. It's all relevant to the 20-ish year old girl in question and what kind of attributes that particular girl/woman has to offer; an intelligent and a sharp brain, great talents, premature wisdom, education, abilities to interact successfuly and well with people, patience with children, a great love and a heart in her bosom and the list could go on and on. But if we take a concensus and somewhat generalize of 20-ish young women, other than their young and firm skin, beautiful face, young and a healthy blood; a young woman can offer youthful passions and the love of enjoyment and an overall fulfillment of life. Youthful good health that comes with a young body, a psychological (firstness, first experiences) and the bewilderment of that initial experiments of life that makes a person feel very special on that first and utmost experiences in life. As children do in the first stages of their life as first experiences do become very special for them. A first time loving and sex if that applies, etc. etc.

You can add if you wish or anything else that comes to mind.

Again, other than what I have mentioned above, it is all relevant to the individual's upbringing, education, nurturing from their families, and their own gifted talents if they have any, positive feelings (kindness or otherwise) etc. etc. etc.

It seemed to me that you are somehow opposing - i.e. comparing - young women and older ones and you seem to believe that "good skin and a pretty face" is basically what a young woman has to offer to an older man that most older woman can't.

My question was: "Do you think that a younger woman can offer an older man something - that most older women can't - different than 'good skin and a pretty face'?"
So it's about the difference between younger and older women other than the physical appearance.

I believe the conversations revolved or actually was questioned whether an older woman should or would have a relationship or a marriage with a younger man and if that was OK. In view of that question, I gave the attributes only of the older woman; because the relevant question asked was about an older woman versus a young man.

I see that now you are turning the question towards the 20-ish and the younger woman's attributes. Well then you can see my answer on that as well above.

Actually, your comment reminded me of a similar comment in the movie "La petite Lili" of Claude Miller that I found somehow "unfair" towards younger women because many/some do offer more than "good skin and a pretty face" - and more often than older women do??? Something that some may consider "beautiful and precious."
But, before I answer my own question, I wanted and still would like to hear your views on it.Thanks.

You are welcomed. As I said above, the topic in question was merely about an older woman getting into a relationship with a younger man. Therefore I obviously stressed on the older women's attributes; but yes younger women could and would offer many attributes as I have mentioned above.

[Siamanto]

Re: does age matter?

No of course not. Siamanto, I appreciate your valid comment that the rest of the package is reletavily more important and vital than the outside package. But you know if you'll excuse me saying this Armenian saying; "Deskn el arje hazar nerpov". "The looks are but worth a thousand from what it is within". When as human beings we try to find or seek a mate we mostly tend to search for good looks first then what the person is like. We fall for looks; but then it is up to us to dump them if they don't fit the rest of the package. In short, if they are not wothwile to keep. I guess that's why it's important to overlook so much the looks of the person and try to see the real person hidden under the good or the not so good outlook.

I admit it's hard sometimes to do; but for the sake of one's sanity it is imperative to find out the whole package before getting into a relationship.

I agree that physical appearance - or what I call "Eye Vitamin" - is of relevance but, my question was not "What is relevant and what is not in a relationship?" or "Whether physical appearance is more - or less - important than 'the rest of the package' in a relationship?" That is a legitimate topic in itself that we will probably touch a bit later.
I'm sorry if my question did not seem clear enough.


In

All the Armenian guys want is a way younger girls. They would be in their forties and they sometimes want 14, 18, 22 years younger girls... not an older girl/woman.

Some women they age gracefully. Having good skin and a pretty face, sometimes they look 10-15 years younger. So in my opinion it should work.

It seemed to me that you are somehow opposing - i.e. comparing - young women and older ones and you seem to believe that "good skin and a pretty face" is basically what a young woman has to offer to an older man that most older woman can't.

My question was: "Do you think that a younger woman can offer an older man something - that most older women can't - different than 'good skin and a pretty face'?"
So it's about the difference between younger and older women other than the physical appearance - and what's in "the rest of the package."

Actually, your comment reminded me of a similar comment in the movie "La petite Lili" of Claude Miller that I found somehow "unfair" towards younger women because many/some do offer more than "good skin and a pretty face" - and more often than older women do??? Something that some may consider "beautiful and precious."
But, before I answer my own question, I wanted and still would like to hear your views on it.Thanks.

[Anoush]

Re: does age matter?

Thanks Anoush. I'll take your words carefully and seriously.

You are welcomed janik.