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  • Are you happy now Armenia!!!

    UN Votes to Make Turkey Imaginary Country until Armenian Genocide is Recognized.



    As the Turkish government continues its prosecution of famed novelist Orhan Pamuk on charges he “denigrated the Turkish national identity” by saying that the Armenian genocide of World War I did indeed happen, the UN has decided to investigate Turkish History and determine if, in fact, there is truly a country named Turkey.

    “Until we get some real evidence, the so-called country named Turkey will receive imaginary country status within the UN,” said Kofi Annan, UN Secretary General. “As an imaginary country, they are welcome to attend our UN sessions, but no one really needs to listen to them.”

    The new status for Turkey took effect quickly. During an afternoon general assembly on the topic of peace in the Mideast, the Turkish ambassador took the floor and offered Turkey’s perspective on the situation. Many of the UN representatives began gobbling, preening, and scuffling around their desk. Once the bewildered ambassador finished and took his seat, the Israeli representative took the microphone.

    “I’m sorry, did someone say something?” he asked.

    Muttering filled the room over the protests of the Turkish representative.

    “I heard a lot of wind,” responded the Lebanese representative. “There must be a storm outside.”

    “Perhaps,” responded the Israeli. “But to me, it sounded more like a gobbling sound. Like a large, flightless, feathered bird.”

    “Yes!” said the Russian ambassador. “That’s it! I heard it. But it was indecipherable.”

    “I guess we should move on.”

    Later in the day, at a reception for some Asian dignitaries visiting the 3M, many representatives arrived adorned with fake wattles—the fleshy piece that dangles from a turkey’s neck. There was a moment of embarrassment as the Turkish ambassador frantically scurried around the room, trying to remove the wattles and demanding that his colleagues listen to him.

    An investigatory committee has been formed to produce evidence of Turkey’s history and existence.

    “It’s really quite simple,” said Kofi Annan. “If the Armenian Genocide did not happen, then there’s a strong likelihood that Turkey never happened. We’re going to use the same level of investigatory diligence and scholarship that Turkey has used in investigating the Armenian genocide, and find out if we’ve had an imposter in the UN all these years. If what we suspect is true, we believe that there’s a huge land mass in the middle east that’s for sale. Israel is apparently very interested.”

    The Spoof news archive all funny spoof news stories and parody satire headlines story not found 9909
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    Arabic is a Language, Persian is a sweetmeat, Turkish is an Art. (Old Persian proverb)

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  • #2
    Turanist, dont tell me you took this seriously

    Comment


    • #3
      At least I am!!!!!!!

      hehehe....

      Comment


      • #4
        I laughed so hard I pissed my pants.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Kharpert
          I laughed so hard I pissed my pants.
          +1

          Comment


          • #6
            He is being sarcastic I think..

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Turanist
              UN Votes to Make Turkey Imaginary Country until Armenian Genocide is Recognized.



              As the Turkish government continues its prosecution of famed novelist Orhan Pamuk on charges he “denigrated the Turkish national identity” by saying that the Armenian genocide of World War I did indeed happen, the UN has decided to investigate Turkish History and determine if, in fact, there is truly a country named Turkey.

              “Until we get some real evidence, the so-called country named Turkey will receive imaginary country status within the UN,” said Kofi Annan, UN Secretary General. “As an imaginary country, they are welcome to attend our UN sessions, but no one really needs to listen to them.”

              The new status for Turkey took effect quickly. During an afternoon general assembly on the topic of peace in the Mideast, the Turkish ambassador took the floor and offered Turkey’s perspective on the situation. Many of the UN representatives began gobbling, preening, and scuffling around their desk. Once the bewildered ambassador finished and took his seat, the Israeli representative took the microphone.

              “I’m sorry, did someone say something?” he asked.

              Muttering filled the room over the protests of the Turkish representative.

              “I heard a lot of wind,” responded the Lebanese representative. “There must be a storm outside.”

              “Perhaps,” responded the Israeli. “But to me, it sounded more like a gobbling sound. Like a large, flightless, feathered bird.”

              “Yes!” said the Russian ambassador. “That’s it! I heard it. But it was indecipherable.”

              “I guess we should move on.”

              Later in the day, at a reception for some Asian dignitaries visiting the 3M, many representatives arrived adorned with fake wattles—the fleshy piece that dangles from a turkey’s neck. There was a moment of embarrassment as the Turkish ambassador frantically scurried around the room, trying to remove the wattles and demanding that his colleagues listen to him.

              An investigatory committee has been formed to produce evidence of Turkey’s history and existence.

              “It’s really quite simple,” said Kofi Annan. “If the Armenian Genocide did not happen, then there’s a strong likelihood that Turkey never happened. We’re going to use the same level of investigatory diligence and scholarship that Turkey has used in investigating the Armenian genocide, and find out if we’ve had an imposter in the UN all these years. If what we suspect is true, we believe that there’s a huge land mass in the middle east that’s for sale. Israel is apparently very interested.”

              http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s3i9909

              you probably forgot to read this part of the article "The story as represented above is written as a satire or parody. It is fictitious." Unfortunately for us....

              Comment


              • #8

                Ok, so I guess we DO need a laughing smiley for this forum.

                Comment


                • #9
                  One more

                  Axis of Evil admits Turkey; now called Bloc of Badness



                  Confirming weeks of speculation, the Axis of Evil proudly admitted a new member yesterday, the Republic of Turkey. With the addition of a fourth member, the cluster of renegade republics will henceforth be known as the Bloc of Badness. The announcement was made yesterday at a press conference in Tehran, where members of the Bloc had gathered for a three day boondoggle of madcap madness and mayhem, courtesy of Iranian leader Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

                  With a resume that includes a World War I alliance with Germany, the systemic murder of 1.2MM Armenians, the systemic denial of the murder of 1.2MM Armenians, and a human rights record that suggests, at the very least, a bad temper and a fondness for fire, Turkey certainly boasted the credentials for membership in the Axis of Evil. But Iran and North Korea, in particular, had become increasingly annoyed by Turkey’s flagrant attempts to gain favor with the world by pursuing membership in the European Union, and felt the country was losing touch with its brutal legacy.

                  It’s now known that none other than North Korean leader Kim Jong Il flew to Ankara to meet with Turkish President Ahmet Necdet Sezer. The conversation was taped by a CIA spy posing as a waiter in Sezer’s palace.

                  Jong-Il: “Ahmet, why you play nice now? You change so much. I don’t know you anymore.”

                  Sezer: “Oh, Kim. I haven’t changed. The world has changed. You used to be able to get away with so much more, but now…it’s just different. I can’t fart now without Amnesty International calling for an investigation. And this damn Armenian thing….what’s it been, 85 years? Give it a rest already.”

                  Jong-Il: “It is hard to be ruthless dictator today. You try and get good Cognac cross 38th parallel. But this is why we must stick together. And this is why I’m here. We’ve been talking.”

                  Sezer: “We?”

                  Jong-Il. “Me and Mahmoud. Have you heard him lately? He say Holocaust a myth! He really crack me up. You and he, you have a lot in common! Anyway, we want you to join the Axis. But you have to stop this goody 2-shoes stuff. It’s so unattractive.”

                  Sezer: “Really?”

                  Jong-Il: “Yes. Mahmoud wanted to make you declare war on someone to get you in, but I told him no. I told him I talk to you. Now we talk.”

                  No word yet on where the Bloc will set up headquarters.

                  The Spoof news archive all funny spoof news stories and parody satire headlines story not found 9939

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Are you happy now Reincarnated Am ?

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