friends and relationships

[angelik22]

I was jsut thinking, how much is too much to discuss about your relationship ("love life") to a friend?

No matter how good of a friend, I would never tell too much to them about my love life-- for example if you have a fight with ur significant other or what not, I dont think that it's anyones business- because the more people involved- the more people that know, the bigger the problem gets- right?

and other things such as "intimate" details, I just cannot stand the "Sex and the city" type of girls- why is it amuseing to others what you do with your man in bed or on the floor?

anywhoo--what's your take on it?

[hyebruin]

if he's being a pig, hell ya!!! talk about it and let it be known that he's a pig and HOW exactly he is being one! haha!! but if he's nice and genuine and caring and the relationship is special, then yes! keep that mouth shut!

[SagGal]

I was jsut thinking, how much is too much to discuss about your relationship ("love life") to a friend?

No matter how good of a friend, I would never tell too much to them about my love life-- for example if you have a fight with ur significant other or what not, I dont think that it's anyones business- because the more people involved- the more people that know, the bigger the problem gets- right?

Well, if you had a fight and you need some advice of how to resolve it, then why shouldn't you discuss this with your closest friend?
What do you mean the more people know the bigger the problem? Not if you go about it right. If I had a serious fight with my boyfriend and it was really bothering me, I'd talk to my best friend about it and ask her for advice. That can also fall under girltalk. As for intimate details, that's just between the couple. No bedroom details for me, thank you very much.

[hyebruin]

well, sometimes to be fair and objective you also need a guy's point of view! (do i score points here? for saying that? )haha..anyways, having more girls get together and agree that he should have done this and that and ...etc is NOT good for the relationship! and only fuels the g/f to go back for another match of verbal kung foo! we're forgetting that as good as our friends' intentions are they are NOT therapists and you should take their advice with discretion and your own intuition and common sense! and ultimately talk to your significant other when the time is right...

[loseyourname]

if he's being a pig, hell ya!!! talk about it and let it be known that he's a pig and HOW exactly he is being one! haha!! but if he's nice and genuine and caring and the relationship is special, then yes! keep that mouth shut!

Oh, that's really fair. If the guy's an a-hole, tell anyone who can hear. If he's nice, keep it a secret.

[gevo]

Well.. i think what angelik is talking about hee is "gossip" instead of asking for advice.. such as.. the girl doesnt really caref what her friend thinks or suggests, but just a means of her talking and using the friend as a means of "getting it out"... anywho..

Bruin jan your right.. .. u do score some points.. lol.. but careful that the guy your asking adice from isnt one thats after you as well.. HAHAA.. he mjight be a "little" biased.. u know... lol..

And i say keep your info to yourself.. if you have a question and need advice, thats different than either bragging, or complaining or.. u know... the stupid gossip crap ... anywho.

[hyebruin]

Oh, that's really fair. If the guy's an a-hole, tell anyone who can hear. If he's nice, keep it a secret.

oh jeezz, that is NOT what i was saying!
never mind...interpret as you wish...

[SagGal]

I agree about asking for the guy's opinion also, but a girl (considering we are talking about a girl here and the same thing goes for a guy if we're talking about a guy) should be careful how many people she gets advice from because the word spreads and the main topic here is about telling people personal details.

P.S. I just used the word "advice" as an example.

[angelik22]

o okie let me make it clearer, advice is one thing, but putting your boyfriend down if front of others is another thing. Hypothetically speaking, if my boyfriend and I got into a small quarrel I would talk to a friend about it, or ask for advice if i saw the need of any, but I definately wouldn't start talking smack about my boyfriend to my friends-
I say this because I see it in a few of my friends, and they say all these things about their boyfriends to me and then when theyre back with the dude, they act liek he's a God- so why talk smack first of all? and second of all have some self respect right?

another thing about this is that you ahve to respect the other person in the relationship and not tell others every single thing that happens between you two, because I know for a fact that guys do not like it when their girlfriend's friends know more about what's going on in the relationship than he does...
I guess this is because im referring to a particular situation here, and it's not a general sort of inquiry--

[SagGal]

...another thing about this is that you ahve to respect the other person in the relationship and not tell others every single thing that happens between you two, because I know for a fact that guys do not like it when their girlfriend's friends know more about what's going on in the relationship than he does...

True, unless the other person feels comfortable about it. Notice that there are couples who tell people their business and people just don't give a ____. lol. Two of my friends used to do that, until they broke up.