What are your thoughts on spanking children

[clubbin714]

Hello all...I was just wondering what you people think about spankings...is it a good way to teach a kid discipline? What would you do if you had a child and he/she got out of line all the time? Do Armenian families typically use spanking as a form of punishment? A friend and I have two totally different viewpoints on the subject and I am interested to know how all of you feel about it. Thanks.

[Sally]

I think parents must teach their kids discipline but there are another ways to teach except for spanking.If i were a mother, i would tell my kids what he/she have to do or doesn't have to do sth kindly.

[joint1]

I think if anyone including myself spanks my child i will kill them it is wrong and stupid
that shows if you spank you child or hit them that shows that you are weak inside and your just plane old stupid and does not know how else to disipline the child
I love my child to death and if anyone hurts her i will hurt them back

[sad_eyes]

I dissaprove of it very much so. I was spanked with a leather belt and a big wooden spoon as a child and I believe me, I am %100 percent aware of what it can do to an individual. Its not right. Dont get me wrong, I do believe that they should have some form of punishment if they do something wrong, however beating my child isnt the answer. I dont want my children questioning the level of my love towards them or learn to fear me. If any parent puts the right amount of attention and love towards a child, there shouldent be any reason for that child to be punished.

[Sally]

i totally agree with you. If parents spank their kids,the kids became hateful to them so it's not a solution.

[violette829]

I think the only parents who use spanking as a way to discipline the child are the same ones who sit them in front of the television to shut them up. It's a very lazy alternative to parenting, in my opinion. Most parents who spank their children are working class parents, who really have "no time" to really give the attention and TLC that kids need. Here's my take on parenting:

If I want to have children, I will have to quit work to take care of him/her until he/she is of age to understand most things and put my parenting to use in the real world. I know people are different and you all won't agree with me, but this is just the way I want to do it. If I feel that I am not financially stable to quit my job to take care of my child, I won't choose to have one. I dont believe in accidents, so don't even talk to me about that. I can't wait to be a mom! awww

[XxgoeyxX]

My parents spanked me a few times here and there. But no harm done. They just hit me on the butt...loll. But I believe you can teach them a lesson without raising a hand on them.

If I want to have children, I will have to quit work to take care of him/her until he/she is of age to understand most things and put my parenting to use in the real world. I know people are different and you all won't agree with me, but this is just the way I want to do it. If I feel that I am not financially stable to quit my job to take care of my child, I won't choose to have one. I dont believe in accidents, so don't even talk to me about that. I can't wait to be a mom! awww

I agree. If you want to have children you must give them full attention. Especially now a days. It hard to raise children. I'm going to school and trying to do something with my life. But a friend once said isnt being a mother doing something great with your life as well. I have to agree with that too. I rather be a mother who stays home and take care of my children then a mother who neglect her child because my career is on my mind. And I cant wait to be a mommy too..hehe..Good luck Miss. Violette..hope you have lots and lots of babie...hehehe...

[winoman]

OK - as a parent - we have 2 boys - ages 11 & 8 (nearly as old as some of you here!! - making me an old guy - yeah... )...

OK - so let me chime in...I can count the times we've spanked our boys on one hand. In general I don't approve of spanking (or any hitting) or use it...and yeah - most parents who smack their kids are just lazy or worse. I do think that spanking - or the threat of it (which we occasionlly do use...but even that not at all very often) can serve a purpose. The few times we have spanked have been after repeated warnings about behavior and such - with threats of spanking and other attempts to resolve the situation already having been (unsuccessfully) made. And the spankings - though I'm sure they hurt a bit - were never severe or with any implements - and always were followed by an explanation of how it came to such. I do think the threat of spankings - once you have established that it is a potentially real threat - is useful - to curb the unruliest of behaviors. Yeah - the kids don't at all like the idea and ussually shape up pretty quick! I don't believe in random hitting or such either.

You guys will find (eventually?) find that raising children (even pretty good kids like we have) will be very challenging and frustrating at times - and sometimes they will put you at wits end. Kids don't always (..sometimes I think rarely...) listen - even when its (in our eyes) in their best interest to do so - or even when its to prevent a dangerous situation or sometimes yes its just because you've got things to do (like get to work etc) and they are dragging their feet (or worse) - and other times they can be loud and obnoxious - repeatedly - in situations where its totally inappropriate/uncalled for or just creating a din over time that prevents you form doing stuff etc and can just drive you nuts. SOmetimes even the best strategies to elicit cooperation utterly fail. And you really can't let your kids rule you and run roughshod over you - they have to learn respect for elders and manners and such - so important for eventully becomming decent human beings and not disrespectful little brats & worse....so - you will see - sometimes more extreme punishment methods might be necissary (no removal of digits or limbs or such or other medivial type punishments though...lol)- there is a whole arsenal of other (gentler behavior modification) methods to use before it comes to such (IMO)...all that being said - I can;t recall the last time either boy was spanked by us - I'm sure it has been years...and yeah - we have pretty good kids I think...

[gevo]

I think if anyone including myself spanks my child i will kill them it is wrong and stupid
that shows if you spank you child or hit them that shows that you are weak inside and your just plane old stupid and does not know how else to disipline the child
I love my child to death and if anyone hurts her i will hurt them back

that is a very credible arguement...

I believe within very constrainted limits it is alright to spank.. not hit, not torture, not damage your child physically.. but spank..
I love my little sisters, if anyone was to touch them i would break their necks, but if needed i will pretend im spanking them, to teach them (with a lengthy lecture in simple terms) why what they are doing is wrong.. abuse is different sad eyes jan.. being hit with a belt is a problem of that who is hitting, not you... and spanking is not anything like that, it is one of the last resorts to explicitly discipline...

So, my argument is based on the fact of spanking ,not hitting.. please make sure and differ the two.. though i must say most of the time, if not all, i see that kids who will continue to do it their way will do it almost regardless of any disciplin.. so in my experiances (not my own kids i dont have any) i have noticed that once you establish authority with the child, he/she will be more willing to listen to you, and less willing to displease you.. and when you do get mad at her, a simple change of tone fixes the sitaution, and an explanation is a must for the child to udnerstand (no matter how young) that you love him.her, yet she cannot do such and such..

and, basically that was a long explanation to saying that, spanking is ok within strict limits.

[gevo]

OK - as a parent - we have 2 boys - ages 11 & 8 (nearly as old as some of you here!! - making me an old guy - yeah... )...

OK - so let me chime in...I can count the times we've spanked our boys on one hand. In general I don't approve of spanking (or any hitting) or use it...and yeah - most parents who smack their kids are just lazy or worse. I do think that spanking - or the threat of it (which we occasionlly do use...but even that not at all very often) can serve a purpose. The few times we have spanked have been after repeated warnings about behavior and such - with threats of spanking and other attempts to resolve the situation already having been (unsuccessfully) made. And the spankings - though I'm sure they hurt a bit - were never severe or with any implements - and always were followed by an explanation of how it came to such. I do think the threat of spankings - once you have established that it is a potentially real threat - is useful - to curb the unruliest of behaviors. Yeah - the kids don't at all like the idea and ussually shape up pretty quick! I don't believe in random hitting or such either.

You guys will find (eventually?) find that raising children (even pretty good kids like we have) will be very challenging and frustrating at times - and sometimes they will put you at wits end. Kids don't always (..sometimes I think rarely...) listen - even when its (in our eyes) in their best interest to do so - or even when its to prevent a dangerous situation or sometimes yes its just because you've got things to do (like get to work etc) and they are dragging their feet (or worse) - and other times they can be loud and obnoxious - repeatedly - in situations where its totally inappropriate/uncalled for or just creating a din over time that prevents you form doing stuff etc and can just drive you nuts. SOmetimes even the best strategies to elicit cooperation utterly fail. And you really can't let your kids rule you and run roughshod over you - they have to learn respect for elders and manners and such - so important for eventully becomming decent human beings and not disrespectful little brats & worse....so - you will see - sometimes more extreme punishment methods might be necissary (no removal of digits or limbs or such or other medivial type punishments though...lol)- there is a whole arsenal of other (gentler behavior modification) methods to use before it comes to such (IMO)...all that being said - I can;t recall the last time either boy was spanked by us - I'm sure it has been years...and yeah - we have pretty good kids I think...

DANG!!! I could have saved some typing energy if i had read this first and plainly said "Agreed"