Engaged and now stuck

[violette829]

Getting married/engaged is a big thing that requires 150% respect and thoughtfulness for one another.....

Put yourself in her shoes for a second.
And although I do NOT buy her "i want to experience everything with you" bit, I am certain that she is really wanting to say this:
"I've heard of what goes on in Vegas, so i'm worried and a bit jealous of what may go on seeing that we just got engaged and perhaps you may want to sew your wild oats one last time before embarking on a lifelong journey with me!. Plus you are going with your friend who may want to HAVE SEX with some bimbo he meets when the two of u go out, which might leave you in a situation where you might have to hang out with that bimbo's (hot) best friend and keep her company" (hint hint)

xxxx happens in vegas (or anywhere else for that matter).

I don't blame her one bit about feeling like this, especially in this day and age when so many poeople are fukking around and getting divorced like there's no tomorrow...our community is definitely not barred from this.

I feel that your friend has a responsibilty to her FIRST, before anyone else. He chose her, so he must NOW fully respect her, and have no qualms with INVITING her wherever he goes. YES, I SAID WHEREVER HE GOES!!!!! Marriage is a big thing!
And yes, people too will start gossiping about the fact that he ran off to Vegas soon after engaging this girl..it just doesn't look good either (but the "other peole" is not the gist of this take-home message).

How would you feel if your fiancee went to Cancun with her girlfriends and not you? Don't give me this faithful crap either ("oh I trust her/him...). People just need an excuse nowadays to bone someone. ("ohh i got drunk and it just happened, please forgive me....." crap).

Fukk that.

"What goes on in Vegas stays in Vegas": everybody knows this cliche, and it exists for a reason.

He needs to look at himself closely and go within and analyse what his woman truly represents to him. If she is all that, he should bring her along, and YOU should definitely not have a problem with that. If he's "your boy", then she should be your "sister". You feel me?

DISCLAIMER: I too was engaged 5 years ago, and I fully trusted my gal whenever she wanted to go somewhere with her friends (vacations, dinners, etc..). I believed that she could not cheat on me only because I was too nice and respectful towards her and gave her everything she could possibly need in the 5 years that I dated her.
END RESULT: she had fukked around ALOT (lesbianism with her best friend, threesomes with her best friend & husband, fukking around with her teacher at university, fukked a local tour guide on vacation in the Dominican Rep, and to top it off, started fukking this guy that she worked with (approx 2 months after we got engaged).....

what goes on in Vegas....(however in my case, it didn't stay in Vegas!!!..i found out all this info post-breakup).

What in the world??!?!?!?!?!? I am sooo sorry. But really, doesn't this just go and PROVE the point that if someone's gonna do it, they're gonna do it anywhere? I mean, I've been to Vegas 1000000000 times and have never been ...well nevermind. I was single. Anywho....it's not Vegas, or Europe..it's a TRUST issue. That's what it boils down to. I'm sorry but if my future husband thinks that I'm going to spend my ENTIRE life, experiencing EVERYTHING with JUST HIM..he's gonna be in for a big surprise. Perhaps you haven't heard that when you lock someone in a cage, and try to (what you think) protect her, she's gonna BURST. What's wrong with having a trusting adult relationship? I mean, the guy's engaged, not IMPRISONED. This is why men get the terrible thoughts about settling down with someone. They fear that EVERYTHING in their lives will change. That's just not the case. Even when I'm married, I still want my hubby to go out with his friends, go camping, vegas, europe. I don't care. Let him live. OMG Is it really the END Of the world? NO!!! The reason whyyyyy we have so much divorce is that people go into marriages with the expectation that THIS IS IT....my life is over...>Everything must change. Why? Why do women have to live up to your mothers and wait on you hand and toe? Why do men have to give up ALL of their friends and freedom and spend every waking moment with you? I don't understand. DAMNIT SCREW THIS!!! I'm not getting married.


PS: Happy Valentine's Day!~

[djsinister]

What in the world??!?!?!?!?!? I am sooo sorry. But really, doesn't this just go and PROVE the point that if someone's gonna do it, they're gonna do it anywhere? I mean, I've been to Vegas 1000000000 times and have never been ...well nevermind. I was single. Anywho....it's not Vegas, or Europe..it's a TRUST issue. That's what it boils down to. I'm sorry but if my future husband thinks that I'm going to spend my ENTIRE life, experiencing EVERYTHING with JUST HIM..he's gonna be in for a big surprise. Perhaps you haven't heard that when you lock someone in a cage, and try to (what you think) protect her, she's gonna BURST. What's wrong with having a trusting adult relationship? I mean, the guy's engaged, not IMPRISONED. This is why men get the terrible thoughts about settling down with someone. They fear that EVERYTHING in their lives will change. That's just not the case. Even when I'm married, I still want my hubby to go out with his friends, go camping, vegas, europe. I don't care. Let him live. OMG Is it really the END Of the world? NO!!! The reason whyyyyy we have so much divorce is that people go into marriages with the expectation that THIS IS IT....my life is over...>Everything must change. Why? Why do women have to live up to your mothers and wait on you hand and toe? Why do men have to give up ALL of their friends and freedom and spend every waking moment with you? I don't understand. DAMNIT SCREW THIS!!! I'm not getting married.


PS: Happy Valentine's Day!~

That's exactly what i did in my previous relationship: I gave her all the freedom that she wanted...because I too do not believe in the encagement theory.

and look what happened!

So then..........

[violette829]

That's exactly what i did in my previous relationship: I gave her all the freedom that she wanted...because I too do not believe in the encagement theory.

and look what happened!

So then..........

I'm sorry to say this, but your ex girlfriend was a h00ker and deserves to be caged and beaten with a sharp metal object. That was an exception and I WAS TRYING TO SAY that no matter what you did with her, she was going to be a h00ker and cheat on you (multiple times ) Do you think if you were on her a5s all the time, choking her, she wouldn't cheat? um....think about it Mr. Canada....it's not that simple. The key to a relationship is to find someone who DESERVES to be trusted and build on it.

Damn I'm good.

[djsinister]

I'm actually the ex-Mr. Canada (from 1997). So no need to call me that anymore.


And yes, she would have cheated if I were the complete opposite.

So then...

[violette829]

I'm actually the ex-Mr. Canada (from 1997). So no need to call me that anymore.


And yes, she would have cheated if I were the complete opposite.

So then...

.....you are a koskhol.

[Sev21]

After reading page 3, I stopped reading the rest and here is what I can tell you.

1) Engagement is commitment. Don't do things without your partner, and surely not go to Vegas without your partner. Sure, the guys want to hangout, and I wish women would stop trying so hard to want to change their men as soon as they get married/engaged....

2) Enjoy the times now because later on when you have kids, you can't easily go to Vegas and chill with friends.

3) Too much freedom can cause worries in a relationship. You risk it.

4) Drama is a must in any Armenian couple/family. Can't avoid it.


Also, djsinister...I am so sorry to hear about your story. Just so evil. Can't imagine....
Now it's time for some chai...

[violette829]

After reading page 3, I stopped reading the rest and here is what I can tell you.

1) Engagement is commitment. Don't do things without your partner, and surely not go to Vegas without your partner. Sure, the guys want to hangout, and I wish women would stop trying so hard to want to change their men as soon as they get married/engaged....

2) Enjoy the times now because later on when you have kids, you can't easily go to Vegas and chill with friends.

3) Too much freedom can cause worries in a relationship. You risk it.

4) Drama is a must in any Armenian couple/family. Can't avoid it.


Also, djsinister...I am so sorry to hear about your story. Just so evil. Can't imagine....
Now it's time for some chai...

.....You're a koskhol too.

[Sev21]

Drama....