Can guys and girls be friends?

[HyeJinx1984]

when did i say the ugly thing???


hey, when a guy says he's your friend and has the hotts for ya to want to do you in an elevator...that is no 'friend'!


nope! i stand by what i say damn it!!
"if there is lust, there can be no true frienship"--'bruin

this changes sort of with married folks..they can be friendly i guess..cuz they have to worry about household chores and expenses and everyday stuff and not just hot nites and weekends

Well, everyone's different, you can't apply the same ideology to everyone. I know people who do have sex with their friends and don't seem to have a problem, and I know people who wait until their married. One rule can't apply to 6 billion people. All you can do is choose whatever philosophy on sex applies best to you.

[loseyourname]

1) Maybe one or both of them is married already?
2) Maybe their future goals are not compatible?
3) Maybe there are cultural, religious, and racial factors making it hard for them in society to be "together"?
4) Maybe they live geographically far apart?
5) Maybe one or both of them have significant commitments (like taking care of an elderly/sick parent/sibling) that makes it hard to be with someone else?
6) ...

No one said they needed to make a lifelong committment to each other. Can't they just get it on every now and then as long as both are single?

[loseyourname]

One rule can't apply to 6 billion people.

Except the rule that all people should marry within their own ethnicity, right Fire?

[anileve]

No one said they needed to make a lifelong committment to each other. Can't they just get it on every now and then as long as both are single?

...

[winoman]

I hate it when a guy and a girl are extremely good friends and find eachother very attractive but they just remain friends. Why? For what stupid reason would you want it to be like this.

If the guy and the girl are that close and obviously love eachothers company because they are the best of friends and love doing things together and hanging out then why the hell shouldn't you just be together if you find the other attractive. You can't get a better girl or guy than that.

Yes - but sometimes it just doesn't work out - and/or there are other things going on that prevent it....circumstances and such - still - can be friends and good friends....(heck her folks wanted her to marry me! LOL - maybe thats part of why we never got together "that way" - she was/is a rebel!)

[winoman]

Don't worry old man (you don't mind if I keep calling you that, do you? ), I go on plenty of dates with my boyfriend. I work during the day and while I am waiting for reactions to run I browse AC. So there! Have fun packing. Be a good Armenian and take your kids to Armenia too.

...guess I've been called worse...and been called a sort of varient of such recently...we'll see about Armenia..perhaps...

Unless you're not Armenian?

This is currently being debated on another forum....(but yeah...at least half anyway...even by the more descriminatory definition)

[winoman]

Where did you get this definition? I find for example that the more successful marriages often involve couples that in addition to being lovers are best of friends. By the way, I hope you realize that you are basically saying only ugly girls can have friends of the opposite sex Now that's just plain silly ...

Well said Sip....(my - how did you manage such wisdom - )

I agree that this is exactly what Bruin is saying...(how little she understands [certain things about/aspects of] guys)...and how little credit she gives us sometimes eh?

[winoman]

hey, when a guy says he's your friend and has the hotts for ya to want to do you in an elevator...that is no 'friend'!

sounds like it was an unpleasent experience for you - and thats understandable...and I agree - not right - you are right to be upset...but still - don't generalize...

[angelik22]

heres what i can say from expereince... i have alot of guy friends- but i dont hang uot with them as much- on a regular basis, so i know thatwhen you do spend alot of time with a friend whose the opposite sex- things happen... becaue come on- friends are peopel we share things in common with- and who better than a friend of the opposite sex to consider for a relationship- i myself think that beingfriends with someone before getting into a relationship is good, because you get to knwo the person on a different level...but yet again- i dont see myself with any of my guy friends- maybe thats because i dont spend too much time with them for anythign to happen- but i do believe that two people of the opposite sex can be friends-- just friends...but if they spend too much time together-- things will elad to more tahn friendship

[ckBejug]

hey, when a guy says he's your friend and has the hotts for ya to want to do you in an elevator...that is no 'friend'!

I had a guy friend who had the hots for me (apparently). He kissed me and it freaked me out a teensy bit because I wasn't sure if I wanted that to happen..... He is my boyfriend now, and still one of my best friends.

Sometimes it works out, I guess. I find that relationships built with friendship as a foundation work really well (for me) because there is already a mutual love and respect for eachother and, like Omni said, you already know you mesh well and love spending time with each other...

The problem I have is that because it has been my experience (twice now) that the good friendship I have with a guy has developed into something more (not friends with benefits, mind you, actual relationships) I am overly cautious about the fact that my current boyfriend, in turn, has various other female friends that I feel like I should be leery of. The history here is that one of my ex boyfriends 'friends' slept with him (because I wouldn't and it was a shaky long-distance relationship, etc...) and ended my last relationship... Even though I trust the new guy there is still my history that makes me have an issue with his other female friends, albeit a small issue...