Is your intellectual thinking keeping you from being social?

[IamLegend]

Do you ever find yourself thinking to such an extent about everything that you just cant find anyone worth your time? Being able to think on high levels is great, but sometimes it really does make an obstacle of having "fun"

Trying to be social with stupid people is pretty difficult too, you can try but eventually you'll realize that you're trying to socialize with simple minded sheep... and then a sense of discomfort sets in.

Alright, so lets say you actually know decent people... but their friends are just so friggin stupid... some of you can hang around and feel perfectly comfortable... I just can't.

I dno, im worried that as I get older, it's just going to get worse. I like to think about the choices I make in my life and the people and things I surround myself with, I've noticed for other people that doesn't matter too much.

...as for ever finding potential wife material, chances are I'll have to snag em right after high school or something before they start getting attached to too many moronic people.

Anyone else have this problem?

[Tres Bien]

yeah i do have that problem...not that I AM PERFECT. But i feel that beeing surronded with morons have been one of the great missfortunes in my life unfortunatly...i ´find it very hard to talk about trivial stuff and just feel like im waisting my time

I would choose to socialize with armenians more than other people , like swedes for example)..or serious musicians /artists/...
when you re working or playing music for example...its great to be with people on the same level with you...for excample in music...its like that in real life too...

If someone who cant play very good piano and im forced to play with him, the level of the performance gets lower...and so does youre mood.

[Crimson Glow]

Andre: I've felt that way a great many a times. And trust me; it does NOT get better with age. Bear with me through a little story, if you will. I promise there is a relation in the end.

I didn't have the internet at home until a couple of years after graduating high school, so I used to have to go to Kinko's Copies to hop on the net. I ran into a 40 something year old while I used to go there. We were both shopping on eBay, so he struck up a conversation one day, which some how escalated to a discussion of life (I think he started it with an anecdote about how rude teenagers in Naperville *the stuck-up Chicago suburb I live in* were nowadays). We got deep into why we behave the way we do, which went to how we pick the things that are important to us, which went to varying paths of life. When he discovered we were on the same wavelength on a lot of things, he asked how I explain all this to others. I asked him if he's ever seen the Matrix, to which he replied "of course". I proceeded to explain the parallels between my philosophies, and how they correspond/relate to "unplugging" from the system. He was totally blown away. "I thought it was just a cool movie with heavy religious undertones". Well, every time we'd run into each other, we'd talk for hours at a time about existence in general. Once you get started, there's so much to talk about, and it’s so scarce that you run into some one who is interested in discussing such things, you just....kinda' loose track of time. The Kinko's employees must have thought we were crazy. Smoke break after smoke break, they'd find us out in the parking lot still talking.

On our first day of conversing, he asked how old I was. I was 20 at the time, and he said he found it impressive for someone my age (especially in the town I live in ) to be getting this deep into contemplating what reality means/is. He was also disappointed it took him so long before this subconscious form of control was brought to his attention. He was basically your typical business man all his life, part of the mindless mass public sheep, until he ran into this college professor that opened up his mind to the fact that he had created a prison for himself. The first thing he told him was “don’t say a word for 24 hours, and just observe the people around you. Don’t think anything about it, don’t say anything about it, and don’t intervene in it. Just observe how people act. We’ll talk about your awakening next time we speak”. Now what he said he discovered was already known to me, and could take up a book on its own, so I’m not going to get into that. But if you know what I’m talking about, you don’t need me to, anyway. So, a lot of what this man talked about revolved around what he had learned from this professor, and how he had introduced so many ideas to him that he never even thought about prior to this. He'd always be like "well, professor blah would call that....”, or “professor blah would say that..." etc, every time we touched on an idea. I told him that coming upon this discovery had nothing to do with age. You can be made aware of that cord attached to your mind at any given moment, any given time, and through any given means. Unfortunately, the vast majority will never come to know such things as they drift through life, oblivious to the big picture of their existence.

And now, as advertised, the related part this was all building up to. Well…the guy once mentioned something that I never even gave much thought to until he brought it up. He said his professor once warned him that somewhere along the way, as you get deeper into uncovering the layers of our mental prison, you'll start becoming very stuck-up. You will not be able to tolerate people who are not on your level of thinking, and become extremely frustrated and irritated when dealing with the average person. You will eventually pull more and more away from people, and almost become a loner. I stood there and thought about what he had just said, and my behavior in certain situations towards others, and realized "whoa….you know what? You’re right". I find it very difficult to relate to people. I have for quite some time. I feel very much like Neo after he was freed from the system, coming back into the Matrix, knowing what so few know. Who the hell would you talk to about it? How could it possibly be explained to anyone that which you must “see for yourself”? It would be a futile conversation.

What will come of this? What kinds of answers can this offer? I don’t know. Certainly, finding someone you’re compatible with in day to day interactions is difficult enough, let alone finding someone for a romantic relationship. Sometimes it gets depressing, roaming through life aware, while existing with all those that are still plugged in, and wondering where this is taking you. The only thing I know for certain is that I don’t regret “unplugging”, as Cypher did. I may get discouraged or exasperated from time to time, but I will NOT live by the “ignorance is bliss” norm. I will not structure my life systematically in a vigorous effort to avoid being put in an uncomfortable, vulnerable position. Our existence is a never ending question with no demonstrable answers, and no amount of constructing outlines and plans for life will allow you to run or hide from this. This is life, take it or leave it.

[IamLegend]

I think that about covers how I feel about the issue. It is difficult almost unbelievable that many people don't see things within the big picture. It isn't rocket science, there are very simple and predictable cycles of life. "An Unexamined life is not worth living" but I suppose the social norm has become "An Unexamined life is the only way to enjoy living" . I've met people capable of thinking deep into the meaning of their actions and behaviors...but they choose not to, which is exactly the "ignorance is bliss" norm. I suppose those people feel intelligent in respect to the world that they live in... yet here I am feeling intelligent because I feel as if I am exposed to higher levels of understanding because the world in which I live in is far more complex than the "Ignorance is bliss" individual. Anyhow, it does create a kind of "stuck up" attitude at times, which is why socializing with people of different levels of understanding can prove extremely difficult.

Eh, I dno, I guess it's still better to live life with a great sense of self-awareness than otherwise, even if that means I will grow more and more of a "loner" with time.

[ArmoBarbi]

I know exactly what you mean. ...it creates a combination of pride and frustration. I just try to remind myself about the people that I dont have this problem with.

[Anonymouse]

Do you ever find yourself thinking to such an extent about everything that you just cant find anyone worth your time? Being able to think on high levels is great, but sometimes it really does make an obstacle of having "fun"

Trying to be social with stupid people is pretty difficult too, you can try but eventually you'll realize that you're trying to socialize with simple minded sheep... and then a sense of discomfort sets in.

Alright, so lets say you actually know decent people... but their friends are just so friggin stupid... some of you can hang around and feel perfectly comfortable... I just can't.

I dno, im worried that as I get older, it's just going to get worse. I like to think about the choices I make in my life and the people and things I surround myself with, I've noticed for other people that doesn't matter too much.

...as for ever finding potential wife material, chances are I'll have to snag em right after high school or something before they start getting attached to too many moronic people.

Anyone else have this problem?

Bridging the gap between intellects is often a failed effort like water poured on sands. Hence that one is always apt to be more secure in the solitude of ones thoughts than in the music halls of the masses.

I very much agree with what you say because I too have always felt an alienation from the mass of people. Ever since I was about seven years old I felt conscious of being conscious not in the usual sense, but in the sense that I was weird and felt different for no other reason at all other than I just felt it. I have always felt more mature than the people in my age group around me. My thoughts have always been weirder, and more profound than that of the average plebian next to me. Although I cannot confirm this, but I felt it, intuition. I still feel it. Growing up I was always more of the loner stuck to my thoughts and my hobbies. And it felt good. Whenever I had to surround myself with the others I felt misunderstood and uncomfortable. I felt more comfortable in conversations with those several years older than I, then I have with those in my group. I too have noticed how easily other associate with each other, but I calmly sip my drink and chuckle at them because I can.

In my dealings with people I have personally felt this mark of delineation. I am not alone. I know this. It has spilled over into the areas of romance perhaps even affected my behavior in the past. Because I felt that no girl can understand me, I was only concerned with only getting pleasure from girls and nothing more. I never considered there would be a female that would remotely match me in some sort of way. To me they were merely there for sexual pleasures. Even when I saw a hot girl I wouldn't care for her, because she had nothing to offer me in terms of intellect. Her hotness was nothing to me. Sure it is great but not the cake. Hotness is as trivial and abundant as the rain drops in a thunderstorm, but intellect is as hard to come across and as rare as a Liger.

In social circles with friends, at the bars, or whatever, I morph to their level. Essentially what I have felt about myself is that I can easily adapt to the level of others. In essence, I am resilient to my surroundings, I can conform to the intellects of others and their characters because I feel if I were to show myself I would get bemused looks and even if I were to explainthey wouldn't understand, so why bother? But that is not to say I am not myself. I very much am myself and that is being myself. I do not care for what others think, but if I am to socialize with people in my range I am forced to drop to their level, because I cannot socialize with those such as myself. This leads to this problem of intellectual solitude and misunderstanding, and not necessarily in a bad way.

It is the classic struggle between the intellect and the ignorance of the masses, the individual and the herd. This is what attracted me alot to Nietzsche's writings, and to a lesser extent, Bernard Shaw. They better than any thinkers have captured the solitude of the misunderstood thinker. And unlike the insecure conformists who want others to follow their thinking, to make others think like them, I do not. In fact I want to remain misunderstood in social circles and when they least expect it they can get a taste of your intellect and be shocked as to how weird you are. There is greatness in wanting to be oneself stirred up against the herd and rabble and the popular opinions or what is socially accepted dogma, such as the egalitarianism or liberal democracy. Being misunderstood, to Nietzsche and Shaw, was proof that one was on the right track because the masses are the enemies of intellect and culture. Like them I have a disdain for democracy, socialism, and egalitarianism, because like them I believe it makes men small, and turns man into a conformist. I have always felt completely indifferent to what masses think and because of that I have had difficulty in associating with people. It is no doubt hard, but it is the way I want it to be. I do not want to be understood by them, because they cannot understand even if they tried, and if they did understand it would bridge the gap between the intellect and the plebian and such would mean the end of existence as some are meant to be thinkers and others are made to be followers.

[spiral]

This is one of the best threads we've had in a while.

And here's a little poem as my contribution.


Alone

by Edgar Allan Poe

From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were; I have not seen
As others saw; I could not bring
My passions from a common spring.
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow; I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone;
And all I loved, I loved alone.
Then - in my childhood, in the dawn
Of a most stormy life - was drawn
From every depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain,
From the red cliff of the mountain,
From the sun that round me rolled
In its autumn tint of gold,
From the lightning in the sky
As it passed me flying by,
From the thunder and the storm,
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view.

[thedebutante]

Yes peeps. I dont know if I have this problem exactly. As far as intellect and such go, I'm pretty average. However, I have this other problem. I feel like people don't understand me because they never believe me. Yes, I am the boy who cried wolf...except it's been like this since day one and I'm not a boy.

[thedebutante]

Bridging the gap between intellects is often a failed effort like water poured on sands. Hence that one is always apt to be more secure in the solitude of ones thoughts than in the music halls of the masses.

I very much agree with what you say because I too have always felt an alienation from the mass of people. Ever since I was about seven years old I felt conscious of being conscious not in the usual sense, but in the sense that I was weird and felt different for no other reason at all other than I just felt it. I have always felt more mature than the people in my age group around me. My thoughts have always been weirder, and more profound than that of the average plebian next to me. Although I cannot confirm this, but I felt it, intuition. I still feel it. Growing up I was always more of the loner stuck to my thoughts and my hobbies. And it felt good. Whenever I had to surround myself with the others I felt misunderstood and uncomfortable. I felt more comfortable in conversations with those several years older than I, then I have with those in my group. I too have noticed how easily other associate with each other, but I calmly sip my drink and chuckle at them because I can.

In my dealings with people I have personally felt this mark of delineation. I am not alone. I know this. It has spilled over into the areas of romance perhaps even affected my behavior in the past. Because I felt that no girl can understand me, I was only concerned with only getting pleasure from girls and nothing more. I never considered there would be a female that would remotely match me in some sort of way. To me they were merely there for sexual pleasures. Even when I saw a hot girl I wouldn't care for her, because she had nothing to offer me in terms of intellect. Her hotness was nothing to me. Sure it is great but not the cake. Hotness is as trivial and abundant as the rain drops in a thunderstorm, but intellect is as hard to come across and as rare as a Liger.

In social circles with friends, at the bars, or whatever, I morph to their level. Essentially what I have felt about myself is that I can easily adapt to the level of others. In essence, I am resilient to my surroundings, I can conform to the intellects of others and their characters because I feel if I were to show myself I would get bemused looks and even if I were to explainthey wouldn't understand, so why bother? But that is not to say I am not myself. I very much am myself and that is being myself. I do not care for what others think, but if I am to socialize with people in my range I am forced to drop to their level, because I cannot socialize with those such as myself. This leads to this problem of intellectual solitude and misunderstanding, and not necessarily in a bad way.

It is the classic struggle between the intellect and the ignorance of the masses, the individual and the herd. This is what attracted me alot to Nietzsche's writings, and to a lesser extent, Bernard Shaw. They better than any thinkers have captured the solitude of the misunderstood thinker. And unlike the insecure conformists who want others to follow their thinking, to make others think like them, I do not. In fact I want to remain misunderstood in social circles and when they least expect it they can get a taste of your intellect and be shocked as to how weird you are. There is greatness in wanting to be oneself stirred up against the herd and rabble and the popular opinions or what is socially accepted dogma, such as the egalitarianism or liberal democracy. Being misunderstood, to Nietzsche and Shaw, was proof that one was on the right track because the masses are the enemies of intellect and culture. Like them I have a disdain for democracy, socialism, and egalitarianism, because like them I believe it makes men small, and turns man into a conformist. I have always felt completely indifferent to what masses think and because of that I have had difficulty in associating with people. It is no doubt hard, but it is the way I want it to be. I do not want to be understood by them, because they cannot understand even if they tried, and if they did understand it would bridge the gap between the intellect and the plebian and such would mean the end of existence as some are meant to be thinkers and others are made to be followers.

Ya, what he said.

[ArmoBarbi]

Bridging the gap between intellects is often a failed effort like water poured on sands. Hence that one is always apt to be more secure in the solitude of ones thoughts than in the music halls of the masses.

I very much agree with what you say because I too have always felt an alienation from the mass of people. Ever since I was about seven years old I felt conscious of being conscious not in the usual sense, but in the sense that I was weird and felt different for no other reason at all other than I just felt it. I have always felt more mature than the people in my age group around me. My thoughts have always been weirder, and more profound than that of the average plebian next to me. Although I cannot confirm this, but I felt it, intuition. I still feel it. Growing up I was always more of the loner stuck to my thoughts and my hobbies. And it felt good. Whenever I had to surround myself with the others I felt misunderstood and uncomfortable. I felt more comfortable in conversations with those several years older than I, then I have with those in my group. I too have noticed how easily other associate with each other, but I calmly sip my drink and chuckle at them because I can.

In my dealings with people I have personally felt this mark of delineation. I am not alone. I know this. It has spilled over into the areas of romance perhaps even affected my behavior in the past. Because I felt that no girl can understand me, I was only concerned with only getting pleasure from girls and nothing more. I never considered there would be a female that would remotely match me in some sort of way. To me they were merely there for sexual pleasures. Even when I saw a hot girl I wouldn't care for her, because she had nothing to offer me in terms of intellect. Her hotness was nothing to me. Sure it is great but not the cake. Hotness is as trivial and abundant as the rain drops in a thunderstorm, but intellect is as hard to come across and as rare as a Liger.

In social circles with friends, at the bars, or whatever, I morph to their level. Essentially what I have felt about myself is that I can easily adapt to the level of others. In essence, I am resilient to my surroundings, I can conform to the intellects of others and their characters because I feel if I were to show myself I would get bemused looks and even if I were to explainthey wouldn't understand, so why bother? But that is not to say I am not myself. I very much am myself and that is being myself. I do not care for what others think, but if I am to socialize with people in my range I am forced to drop to their level, because I cannot socialize with those such as myself. This leads to this problem of intellectual solitude and misunderstanding, and not necessarily in a bad way.

It is the classic struggle between the intellect and the ignorance of the masses, the individual and the herd. This is what attracted me alot to Nietzsche's writings, and to a lesser extent, Bernard Shaw. They better than any thinkers have captured the solitude of the misunderstood thinker. And unlike the insecure conformists who want others to follow their thinking, to make others think like them, I do not. In fact I want to remain misunderstood in social circles and when they least expect it they can get a taste of your intellect and be shocked as to how weird you are. There is greatness in wanting to be oneself stirred up against the herd and rabble and the popular opinions or what is socially accepted dogma, such as the egalitarianism or liberal democracy. Being misunderstood, to Nietzsche and Shaw, was proof that one was on the right track because the masses are the enemies of intellect and culture. Like them I have a disdain for democracy, socialism, and egalitarianism, because like them I believe it makes men small, and turns man into a conformist. I have always felt completely indifferent to what masses think and because of that I have had difficulty in associating with people. It is no doubt hard, but it is the way I want it to be. I do not want to be understood by them, because they cannot understand even if they tried, and if they did understand it would bridge the gap between the intellect and the plebian and such would mean the end of existence as some are meant to be thinkers and others are made to be followers.

Armanchik

I am having a problem with someone at this very moment due to this!

Its amazing how rude these people can be, and how upset I am instead of him! I think he just doesnt understand the situation, and is emotionally repressed (or simply unaware) otherwise he would be upset as well. I dont know how people do cold things without feeling something. Thats getting into another issue though... Andre, its what I mentioned to you the other night.