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  • #1

    Sexual territorialism? (?)

    Im not sure if this fits better into Romance or here, so Im putting it here.

    Have you guys ever experienced negative emotions when hearing/thinking about your significant other having prior sexual experiences? Did you feel disgusted? Jealous? etc...

    I think I may have a problem with this, when I think about my bf being with his ex it makes me never want to have sex with him and it makes me hate his ex although I dont even know her. Im sure that it means nothing to him now, and whatever we may have in the future will be special for him, but I still feel this pain/anger/disgust/jealousy...

    I hate the thought that someone else ever touched him or that he ever loved/wanted anyone but me (even though I realize its irrational since he didnt even know me then!) I dont want our relationship to suffer because of this. I dont know what to do
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  • #2
    everyone, everyone is always gonna have a past so you cant be pissed off about it.

    as for the disgust, i think it comes from you thinking of sex as such an intimate relation and you need to lighten up about it cause people constantly have meaningless sex these days, which is normal among many regular and respectable people

    as for the jealousy, you have a serious issue with that and i think that you need to work on it before you get more serious about the relationship. It's hard to be with someone when you are terrorized with these feelings.
    "A man can stand anything except a succession of ordinary days."
    -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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    • #3
      If i really seriously care for a girl and if i found out that the girl has been a s_lut before me, i am getting extremely angry.
      But if my girl really loved the guy who she was with before me, i don't have a problem.

      To make it clear i am pissed about her one night stands and her ''affairs'' which were only about sex.I think it is pissing me off the idea that the guys just screwed her and went away with it, and i have to be nice to a woman which has been screwed like that.It is not fair for me to be so nice to her while other men just took whatever they wanted and she liked it a lot as well.

      So i am making her to regret the day that she went with all those guys , by threatning that i will leave her.

      But then again if i really really liked the girl, i would probably forget about it.

      By the way i am having a problem to accept the fact that some armenian girls are being screwed by foreigners.It is as if i see my country getting screwed.

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      • #4
        Well, I have to say that he is more jealous and terrirorial than I am about the present and future. The jealousy Im talking about is like this feeling of... how dare she touch him, not really that I worry about her.

        I do understand that sex isnt always intimate and serious, but in his case it was. He was in love. Its not a matter of me seeing it differently.

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        • #5
          I think maybe women are more prone to this than men?
          Achkerov kute.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Red Brigade
            If i really seriously care for a girl and if i found out that the girl has been a s_lut before me, i am getting extremely angry.
            But if my girl really loved the guy who she was with before me, i don't have a problem.

            To make it clear i am pissed about her one night stands and her ''affairs'' which were only about sex.I think it is pissing me off the idea that the guys just screwed her and went away with it, and i have to be nice to a woman which has been screwed like that.It is not fair for me to be so nice to her while other men just took whatever they wanted and she liked it a lot as well.

            So i am making her to regret the day that she went with all those guys , by threatning that i will leave her.

            But then again if i really really liked the girl, i would probably forget about it.

            By the way i am having a problem to accept the fact that some armenian girls are being screwed by foreigners.It is as if i see my country getting screwed.
            And the guys?? Armenian men can screw Otars, but Armenian women cant? Did I misunderstand, or is this really what you think?

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            • #7
              Originally posted by ArmoBarbi
              Well, I have to say that he is more jealous and terrirorial than I am about the present and future. The jealousy Im talking about is like this feeling of... how dare she touch him, not really that I worry about her.

              I do understand that sex isnt always intimate and serious, but in his case it was. He was in love. Its not a matter of me seeing it differently.
              If he is more jealous and terrirorial than you are, then that's his problem. it doesnt take away from the fact that you need to deal with yours.

              I so did not know he was in love

              but oh well, that was then this is now
              "A man can stand anything except a succession of ordinary days."
              -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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              • #8
                Originally posted by ArmoBarbi
                And the guys?? Armenian men can screw Otars, but Armenian women cant? Did I misunderstand, or is this really what you think?
                I dont think that you misunderstood. It's called being sexist and patheic.
                "A man can stand anything except a succession of ordinary days."
                -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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                • #9
                  I dont think youre right about the jealousy issue. I really dont see it as a problem at this point for either of us. We have nevet had a fight because of jealousy, and when we display it we actually like it. We are both people who believe that some jealousy is healthy.

                  He wasnt in love like true love, obviously, but like I was with my ex's... puppy love.

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                  • #10
                    The miscegenation of our commonfolk with otars is detrimental whether girls or guys so there is no argument there.
                    Achkerov kute.

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