Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

[Virgil]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

hmmm, I re-read the article and noticed it was about him not wanting to lose custody of his daughter... This is actually more familiar to me as a source for driving a father crazy.

My own father was so spiteful towards my mother for divorcing and wanting to keep total custody that he spent money on the most expensive possible lawyers and followed a dictum of "I'd rather spend 500$ from my pocket to take 50$ out of her". He essentially wanted to corner my mother financially as retribution for "ruining the family" and break her down so he could win everything back. She in the meantime was recovering from a brain surgery and could not work.

Another case of this is my piano teacher who divorced her very abusive husband in Egypt, where relations between a married couple were under sharia law. They had a daughter and fought over her custody. In this case, it was the father who had the law on his side, but because he wanted to immigrate to communist Armenia during the 50s with the daughter, a choice that my piano teacher could not stand for concerning her daughter's future, she made plans to flee with her to Canada and succeeded. But in the meantime, she was so scared of her ex-husband that she would sleep with a knife under her pillow.

In both cases, the couples were Armenian. Thus I don't know what the hell some of you are talking about, "how this is a result of odar culture and assimilation". If anything, "the desire to keep true to Armenian culture and not intermarrying" actually played a role in leading my mother and my piano teacher towards their respective abusive relationships. These marriages were familial efforts and were not motivated solely by the choice of the woman in choosing their mate. Thus, the pressure against divorce was often astounding, and this could only feed the abuse when one of the spouses is already committed towards vengeance and spite.

What about the Armenian girl in hospital that had a brick slammed into her by her American boyfriend, you see, I can provide examples as well, extreme examples, but irrespective of these examples, the conclusion for me, is that for the most part, having a kid out of wedlock is not normal among Armenians. During my parents generation, it was shameful for a couple to have a child out of wedlock. Meaning, your parents were grown adults that came to a conclusion to get a divorce. They certainly did not have a child out of wedlock. They got married, they tried their best to work it out, but then came to a conclusion to get a divorce. This process is far and apart from the situation that Mariam was in and the reason she was in this situation was because she turned her back on her Armenian values, the end.

[KanadaHye]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

Kanada you're misrepresenting the law a little bit. From my understanding the law is changing and fathers are getting more rights anyway, but you have a few things wrong.

Man A shares the expense for the children, but does not carry it ALL. Further, if the circumstances change and Man B is living in the house, then Man A can get the support order changed because Man B can be paying a part or all of the mortgage, so that would be removed from the need and then Man B's responsibility would be recalculated.

That depends on the total income between the spouses. If the woman worked part time or had no income at all, then the man is practically fully responsible. My coworker is currently going through a scenario where he married a woman who had filed for bankruptcy prior to his marriage. During the course of their marriage, she had been making payments on time on her credit cards and allowing payments on his to be late constantly. He trusted her with the finances since he was always working on the road. She has now filed for divorce and he is seeking criminal charges against her and her new boyfriend. The children are caught in the middle and have no clue what is going on. In the end, the lawyers will benefit from the whole charade.

[Siggie]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

That depends on the total income between the spouses. If the woman worked part time or had no income at all, then the man is practically fully responsible. My coworker is currently going through a scenario where he married a woman who had filed for bankruptcy prior to his marriage. During the course of their marriage, she had been making payments on time on her credit cards and allowing payments on his to be late constantly. He trusted her with the finances since he was always working on the road. She has now filed for divorce and he is seeking criminal charges against her and her new boyfriend. The children are caught in the middle and have no clue what is going on. In the end, the lawyers will benefit from the whole charade.

That'd be interesting to see how it turns out. Criminal charges for what? If he trusted her to take care of the finances, how can he pursue criminal charges because she paid them late?

My aunt had this in reverse happen to her. Husband was a deadbeat. He took 30k advance on her credit and bought himself a bunch of stuff and paid off his personal debt. She left him and was stuck with that debt.

[KanadaHye]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

That'd be interesting to see how it turns out. Criminal charges for what? If he trusted her to take care of the finances, how can he pursue criminal charges because she paid them late?

My aunt had this in reverse happen to her. Husband was a deadbeat. He took 30k advance on her credit and bought himself a bunch of stuff and paid off his personal debt. She left him and was stuck with that debt.

Not sure, I think he's trying to claim that she set him up. Could be just a wild goose chase his lawyer cooked up. <Shrug>

[Siggie]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

Not sure, I think he's trying to claim that she set him up. Could be just a wild goose chase his lawyer cooked up. <Shrug>

Well that's not right... His attorney can't pursue criminal charges; that's up to the prosecutor. Maybe he's seeking civil damages?

[jgk3]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

What about the Armenian girl in hospital that had a brick slammed into her by her American boyfriend, you see, I can provide examples as well, extreme examples, but irrespective of these examples, the conclusion for me, is that for the most part, having a kid out of wedlock is not normal among Armenians. During my parents generation, it was shameful for a couple to have a child out of wedlock. Meaning, your parents were grown adults that came to a conclusion to get a divorce. They certainly did not have a child out of wedlock. They got married, they tried their best to work it out, but then came to a conclusion to get a divorce. This process is far and apart from the situation that Mariam was in and the reason she was in this situation was because she turned her back on her Armenian values, the end.

Explain to me how her having kids out of wedlock has some kind of causative bearing on her death. All I gather from your statement is that you are correct in pointing out that it is a contradiction of Christian values (which we as Armenians have been following for a long time, and thus it is plausible to consider bastard children as a result of abandoning those values).

[Mos]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

I'm glad Armenian society has not been corrupted too much by the American way. And very glad sexual revolution has not taken place. I am going to fight to keep this the standard in Armenian society. By bringing the great Armenian church more close to the state is the best way and making our laws also reflect higher moral standards. In Armenia, a xxxxx like Mariam would most likely get thrown out of her house and beat up and spat upon anybody who saw her and knew her. She would never have normal life. Western ways has its ups (like education, certain elements of democracy) but also its downs, which I don't have to repeat.

[Siggie]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

I'm glad Armenian society has not been corrupted too much by the American way. And very glad sexual revolution has not taken place. I am going to fight to keep this the standard in Armenian society. By bringing the great Armenian church more close to the state is the best way and making our laws also reflect higher moral standards. In Armenia, a xxxxx like Mariam would most likely get thrown out of her house and beat up and spat upon anybody who saw her and knew her. She would never have normal life. Western ways has its ups (like education, certain elements of democracy) but also its downs, which I don't have to repeat.

While this is taking place in Armenia, perhaps they should also call the man a xxxxx, throw him out, beat him, and spit on him.

[Mos]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

While this is taking place in Armenia, perhaps they should also call the man a xxxxx, throw him out, beat him, and spit on him.

If the man is an otar sure. But in any case it is women's fault almost entirely. And also her parents fault for not growing her up right.

[Virgil]

Re: Las Vegas Shooting of Armenian Girl and Mom

Explain to me how her having kids out of wedlock has some kind of causative bearing on her death. All I gather from your statement is that you are correct in pointing out that it is a contradiction of Christian values (which we as Armenians have been following for a long time, and thus it is plausible to consider bastard children as a result of abandoning those values).

Yeah, it has bearing on her death, I don't know how else to respond to your post? What do you want me to explain? Do you think its normal for a 19 year old to have a child out of wedlock? Would you want your children to have children out of wedlock? How are you trying to justify this and furthermore, how are you even going to remotely claim that within the traditional Christian Armenian family unit it is morally and socially acceptable to do this? Lastly, what is your entire agenda by continually implying that upbringing has no impact on our decisions when in fact our values are based on our upbringing and background. I really am puzzled what response you want from me?