Originally posted by Anonymouse Is this your way of telling us you're a chronic masturbator?
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Originally posted by sSsflamesSs Amen.
My problem is also refusing to compromise. If I see his flaws NOW, how the hell am I going to spend the rest of my life with him, right?
See the problem is that everyone thinks they are "quality" or perfect. Everyone thinks that their partner should be working hard for them. However, when both people do this, they both give off the impression they are not interested in eachother. Then both parties put up defenses, and appear distant. All it needs is one person to start this "i will not comprimise" game. I suggest you just have fun, and look at things one step at a time. Dont try to look so far in the future because those goals look so distant and impossiblel. Just relax, chill out, have fun.
I figure this: If I was a girl, I would date guys all the time! Free meals at good restaurants!!!
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Originally posted by Anonymouse So you date in terms of future prospects? You wouldn't date for the here and now. Instead the one you date you have future plans in mind eh? Is that how I am to interpret it?
For me, casual dating (meaning continued dating despite the fact that you both see that there's no future together) is pointless.
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Originally posted by surferarmo Comprimise is essential.
See the problem is that everyone thinks they are "quality" or perfect. Everyone thinks that their partner should be working hard for them. However, when both people do this, they both give off the impression they are not interested in eachother. Then both parties put up defenses, and appear distant. All it needs is one person to start this "i will not comprimise" game. I suggest you just have fun, and look at things one step at a time. Dont try to look so far in the future because those goals look so distant and impossiblel. Just relax, chill out, have fun.
I figure this: If I was a girl, I would date guys all the time! Free meals at good restaurants!!!
I figure this: surfer, do you have a subconscious desire to be a girl?
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Originally posted by sSsflamesSs To me, dating is not a game, for when one party views it as a game, then the other party (assuming that s/he doesn't hold this view) suffers heartache. Call me selfish, but I don't want to be the other party. Why waste his and my time if nothing good will come of it? When I like someone, someone that I click with on every level, it is very difficult for me to forget about that person and not care. If I continue dating that person for the "here and now", even though he has no future plans, then I'm simply asking for repeated emotional trauma. Makes sense?
For me, casual dating (meaning continued dating despite the fact that you both see that there's no future together) is pointless.
I agree 10 billion times with exactly what you said in the first paragraph flames.
However, I have seen people casually date several people at the same time and they're all good with it, no problem. I couldn't see myself doing something like that (I prefer to just be friends with guys I like being around/ spending time with who I know are not looking for any kind of a relationship, same as myself) because I think it's just weird to try to get on that other level with two or three different guy at the same time. Plus I don't know that I would be able to keep them straight after a while... Wait! Which one were you? Yeah...
As for soul mates... I don't know anymore. I used to think it was true... but not so much anymore. There are guys out there that I find interesting/ fun to be around/ great to talk to and not conversationally challenged/ attractive/ dateable/ etc... So I guess if there was only one guy for me I wouldn't be attracted to these guys, but I am.... Make sense? I thought, as did a lot of peopl who knew me, that i had found that perfect other half for me, but obviously I was wrong. So maybe when people say there isn;t just one person for you out there, they are speaking volumes of truth. Although that's a sad thought to have after you're with someone because then what if you meet one of the other people out there who is good for you? Drama rama.
The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. -- F. Scott Fitzgerald
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