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"Guy Friends"

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  • #101
    Originally posted by omniscient
    I can't believe I've never seen this thread. Well obviously I agree with the thread maker here. This is simple and everything you said Arman in your first post was word for word true. I know this because I have these exact same conversations with girls all the time before anything so I will get my point across. The 'ode to the nice guys' link should be in here as well since in my opinion it is somewhat related, and I can explain that if needed.

    Anyway, I hate how some of you girls think I would wanna smack you upside the head. Some of you even admitted to teasing or having fun with the guys, what is wrong with you people, do you guys get off on this stuff. My main point is this, the bottom line is if a guy and a girl are real good friends and both look good then why the f.uck don't you just be with one another. For the girls, if a guy is that great of a guy and is your good friend, then he is your good friend for a reason. He is trustworthy, caring, fun to be with, ... oh s.hit did I just name the things you want in a man. So boooottooooom line is if a person of the opposite sex is good enough to be a true friend than they are good enough to be more and should be more than that.

    I agree.

    Comment

    • #102
      Originally posted by winoman
      omniscent - I can hardly begin to address all the areas where your analysis falls short. All I can say is that you can only speak from your experience here and it seems to me that it has been limited. You also seem to have this problem of only thinking of women as sex objects. You say that you can't see how a man and a woman could be close and sharing and what not and not preceed to sex (good enough to be a true friend - good enough for sex etc). Well what can I say - its your deficiency really. I have several close female friends that I share much with and the issue of sex with them has never (seriously/realistically) been an issue....could it be/have been - sure perhaps - but is this necessary for friendship - no...does it preclude friendship - no...and so on and so forth. And for one thing one or both might be in a serious relationship or married or such - or just not attracted in a sexual way. I find that friends I have are often becuse of specific coinciding interests. Can't you at all imagine that you might share a specific interest in something with a woman - and perhaps talk about or engage in an activity and enjoy the other's company etc etc without their necessarily being a sexual element at all? If you can do such with a men/men then why not with a woman or women? If you say you can't then I can only conclude that you have a one track mind in regards to women - and I can imagine than many men do (and I cerainly share that track! ) - but I also think that there is much more - to life - to appreciation of others - and concerning in particular friendship etc etc. I would encourage you to try to explore this sometime with a women with whom you might share an interest in something in - and you might be surprised. The added persepctive of a women whom you can trust and talk to - in your life - and without the sexual overtones - may make a great deal of difference in your outlook and perspective and may improve how you manage yourself in the world.

      I don't think was talking about sex. I think what he meant was that if girl and boy are both attracted to eachother, love eachother's company, then they should take their friendship to the next level (not just sex) but a relationship level. At least that's what I got from the post...

      Comment

      • #103
        Originally posted by winoman
        omniscent - I can hardly begin to address all the areas where your analysis falls short. All I can say is that you can only speak from your experience here and it seems to me that it has been limited. You also seem to have this problem of only thinking of women as sex objects. You say that you can't see how a man and a woman could be close and sharing and what not and not preceed to sex (good enough to be a true friend - good enough for sex etc). Well what can I say - its your deficiency really. I have several close female friends that I share much with and the issue of sex with them has never (seriously/realistically) been an issue....could it be/have been - sure perhaps - but is this necessary for friendship - no...does it preclude friendship - no...and so on and so forth. And for one thing one or both might be in a serious relationship or married or such - or just not attracted in a sexual way. I find that friends I have are often becuse of specific coinciding interests. Can't you at all imagine that you might share a specific interest in something with a woman - and perhaps talk about or engage in an activity and enjoy the other's company etc etc without their necessarily being a sexual element at all? If you can do such with a men/men then why not with a woman or women? If you say you can't then I can only conclude that you have a one track mind in regards to women - and I can imagine than many men do (and I cerainly share that track! ) - but I also think that there is much more - to life - to appreciation of others - and concerning in particular friendship etc etc. I would encourage you to try to explore this sometime with a women with whom you might share an interest in something in - and you might be surprised. The added persepctive of a women whom you can trust and talk to - in your life - and without the sexual overtones - may make a great deal of difference in your outlook and perspective and may improve how you manage yourself in the world.
        You're saying my experience is limited, I should be the last person you ever say that too. And I don't know where you are getting this stuff from but I am also the last person to see women as sex objects. I never said a man and women cannot be close and sharing as you put it but I did say that if that is the case then they should be together instead of just "friends". I just realized what you responded with had nooothing to do with what I posted, next time please read carefully because you obviously have no clue what you are talking about. All you keep saying is how a man and a woman can be close with eachother in your whole post and what I'm arguing is that if that is the case then they should take it to the next level. Who was talking about anything sexual .

        Comment

        • #104
          Just saw your posts Violette, thanks for clarifying this to our forum friend Winoman, which I thought was a girl by the way he responded but I just realized he is a guy correct?

          Comment

          • #105
            Originally posted by omniscient
            he is a guy correct?
            I don't know .
            Achkerov kute.

            Comment

            • #106
              He is a guy as far as we know. I believe him.

              Comment

              • #107
                Originally posted by omniscient
                My main point is this, the bottom line is if a guy and a girl are real good friends and both look good then why the f.uck don't you just be with one another. ....if a person of the opposite sex is good enough to be a true friend than they are good enough to be more and should be more than that.
                Hm well I don't see that I'm reading anything into this. What does "just be with one another mean" and "more then that" etc....so what if I was very good friends with 2 (or more) gals - I mean close too and such (isn't this possible)...could I/should I automatically "be with" both of them? And what if I am married...but have close friends that are female? etc - ...then we (my close friedn who happens to be female..) should we "be more then that"? etc etc

                No my first response to your post was entirely on the mark and valid IMO - unless you can somehow explain what you meant by the above thats different from what I'm getting (even if it isn't sex - your implying girlfriend - in a dating way...etc - at the very least) - well this does not cover it for all realities - you are generalizing situations that do not apply in all cases. And yeah - you and others here are mostly young - certianly younger then I - and very likley with much less experience in all sorts of relationships. Not saying that you or anyone is necissarily inexperienced - and everyone - who isn't just a hermit (like certain rodents on the forum) has had unique and worthwhile experiences - likely different then others have had and likely with the ability to bring some perspective and insight - I'm not disputing that. Its just I know I have had a long lifetime of interactions with folks. And I am a very gregarious person - who makes friends easily - and maintains lots of friendships - with both sexes - and while I might not be at all typical - I think I've seen and experienced enough to know a bit what I'm talking about...yeah - really and truly...and I can understand - being young - then when you think about gals - your thinking about sex - yeah - thats good really - - certainly natural. But as you go through life you might find yourself more and more in situations where this is not the only interaction you have with members of the opposite sex - and I'm talking sustained. I don't know - maybe you just can't relate...?

                Comment

                • #108
                  Originally posted by ArmoBarbi
                  He is a guy as far as we know. I believe him.
                  Of course I'm a guy....I like cars

                  Comment

                  • #109
                    that first kiss between friends is always special and while you find the person attractive, after kissing and holding that person, they start to look more beautiful and attractive and kind and sweet with each passing day

                    Comment

                    • #110
                      Originally posted by hyebruin
                      that first kiss between friends is always special and while you find the person attractive, after kissing and holding that person, they start to look more beautiful and attractive and kind and sweet with each passing day
                      Awww, kur jan, you always say such sweet things

                      Just makes me remember how much I miss having a bf

                      Comment

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