Relationship "Problem"

[ckBejug]

Rachel's right. You don't have any right to say that. You don't know him. You have very limited knowledge about their relationship. You have no basis on which to tell her essentially that he just wants to f*ck her and that she means nothing else to him. How insensitive.

Be quiet. Women never like the truth. They are too busy clouding things with their emotions. The eggplant is on the money. You don't have to like it.

Hey Siggie, you're right, they have no right to judge this particular situation because they are not in the relationship so they can't assume what the guy is thinking.

Hey mouse, how do you know that that's the 'truth'? Personal experience?


Don't you just love those Armenian guys who will sleep with girls (Armenian and not) and then make it almost a requirement that the girl they marry be a virgin? Retards.

[patlajan]

Rachel's right. You don't have any right to say that. You don't know him. You have very limited knowledge about their relationship. You have no basis on which to tell her essentially that he just wants to f*ck her and that she means nothing else to him. How insensitive.

Oh I'm sure it's very very complex. She's basicly willing to do anything to fit in, and he's a big coward that can't face his parents because she's an otar. I'm sure there is some deep complex and emotional preplexities. Or maybe they're just EXCUSES.
If he knew he can't be with her why is it this came out recently? Hmmm. All of a sudden it's confession time, well isn't that convinient. Actions say the most about a person.

[patlajan]

Hey, think about what your saying before you write it down. You hvae no right to assume that. That is very ignorant of you. You guys are very cruel and have no hearts.

I'm sorry but that's what I think is going on. If I assumed something you wanted to hear you wouldn't be upset about my assumptions. He's got a shopping list of excuses but bottom line is he's not willing to do what you want. How do you want me to sugarcoat this for you?

[Anonymouse]

I kinda like the way the eggplant just handled it.

[ckBejug]

Oh I'm sure it's very very complex. She's basicly willing to do anything to fit in, and he's a big coward that can't face his parents because she's an otar. I'm sure there is some deep complex and emotional preplexities. Or maybe they're just EXCUSES.
If he knew he can't be with her why is it this came out recently? Hmmm. All of a sudden it's confession time, well isn't that convinient. Actions say the most about a person.

Okay so I agree that he's being a coward, but how do we know he hasn't had these thoughts all along and has been voicing them all along? Here is my problem with the whole situation... they are both too young to figure out for sure if they want to marry eachother anyway. Example: I'm with someone who is Armenian, so there is no 'otar' guy issue, and everything is going very well but if you asked me if this is the person I want to marry I would not be able to give you an answer. He's probably in that kind of situation where he's too young to know what he wants in the far future and it's being compounded by her not being Armenian. Though I'm sure when he makes his decision he should be able to stand up to his dad about that issue.

Anyway Sad_eyes I think you need to figure out if you are willing to be in this constant state of confusion because of your status as an 'otar'. It's really not fair for you to immerse yourself in this guy and his Armenian friends and family just to be shown the door when it comes time to be with someone he feels he can marry. I really think you need to spend time away from him so he can figure out what the hell he wants. Because if you're always available then he won't have to think about what is going to happen later when major decisions need to be made. So stop seeing him for a little while, don't break up but give the relationship some space and be your own person for a while while he sorts things out for himself. Then see what happens...

[sad_eyes]

Be quiet. Women never like the truth. They are too busy clouding things with their emotions. The eggplant is on the money. You don't have to like it.

Since when is YOUR theory the truth? O mighty Anonymouse?

ckBejug- I think you are right, a trail seperation would be a good way for him to make up his mind. Yes, I know we cant always get what we want. And I know I am young to be thinking about marriage. But I want to make something clear, I do not want to marry him NOW. I want to marry him yes, with all my heart, however I am thinking about into the future. And yes, I am aware that I cannot plan the future for myself. Thats in God hands not mine, however I do have wishes and desires for it. And marrying Levon is one of them.

[HyeJinx1984]

If it's any consolation, I'm on your side Sad_Eyes. I'm of the belief that to live is to suffer, and to find strength in the suffering. There's no question you two should not be together. Is that a cruel reality? yes. But that doesn't mean it's not worth being heartbroken over and in need of a shoulder to cry on. Life is suffering.. and sacrafice.

[patlajan]

But if you asked me if this is the person I want to marry I would not be able to give you an answer. He's probably in that kind of situation where he's too young to know what he wants in the far future and it's being compounded by her not being Armenian. Though I'm sure when he makes his decision he should be able to stand up to his dad about that issue.

The questions is not if he WANTS to marry her but if he COULD marry. And his answer is NO it could never happen, because of something she can't change about herself. I don't see any room for improvement here.
Does she really want to marry somone after begging and pleading?

[sad_eyes]

If it's any consolation, I'm on your side Sad_Eyes. I'm of the belief that to live is to suffer, and to find strength in the suffering. There's no question you two should not be together. Is that a cruel reality? yes. But that doesn't mean it's not worth being heartbroken over and in need of a shoulder to cry on. Life is suffering.. and sacrafice.

well said...very admirable.

[Siggie]

The questions is not if he WANTS to marry her but if he COULD marry. And his answer is NO it could never happen, because of something she can't change about herself. I don't see any room for improvement here.
Does she really want to marry somone after begging and pleading?

You're assuming that he'll never change his mind. They're both young. Someone as closeminded as you and anon, likely his Dad, said that he shouldn't marry an "otar" and he just repeated it.
He may choose to make up his own mind about it and decide differently.
There are countless other factors that can be at play here that we don't know about.

You also know nothing about Rachel and her beliefs and views to say that she'll do anythign to fit in. She didn't decide to be with him because she wants to fit in. She's in love.

Damn blockheads. I'd LOVE to know what your longest relationships have been. I wouldn't even be surprised to find that you've never been in one. You clearly know NOTHING about them.

edit - and when did she say that she begged and pleaded?