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What do you guys think? Armenian w/ non-Armenian?

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  • #91
    Re: Dating non-armenians

    Unfortunately with many Armenian families, when you marry someone you marry their entire family So this is a VERY serious issue that you have to resolve before you force this poor girl into your family through marriage! The parents will not stop their behavior and it might actually get worse as the years go on. I have seen this tear families apart and can be very stressing to the kids as well (if there ever are kids). With kids, actually things sometimes get very complicated since the non Armenian woman can never do anything right in the eyes of some Armenian grand parents.

    I'm affraid your only choice really here, if you want to be with this girl, is to move away from your parents. I'm not saying to sever all ties but to have enough of a distance that they will not be able to inject their venum regarding your relationship on a daily basis. You should also shield the girl from having to directly interface with them too much. It is YOUR (plurarl) life and you have every right to live it as you seem fit. Unless she is super strong and knows full well that this is part of the whole deal and if she is prepared to face it ... that's a different story.

    Other than that, your parents have made their choice and moved here to the US (I assume). As part of this, they have implicitly accepted the consequences that goes with such a decision. If they want to preserve their identity and culture, then they should move back to Armenia. If you like the girl a lot, and you get along great, then that's great. But don't be naive to think you will change your parents behavior ... they might mellow out over time but that animosity will always be there (from what I have seen in other similar situations).

    Fortunately my parents are quite open minded and I personally haven't had to go through any of this. But then again, I live in Wisconsin and my parents, grandparents, and close relatives are at least 1000 miles away (most are in CA so that would be 2000 miles).
    Last edited by Sip; 07-05-2006, 11:47 AM.
    this post = teh win.

    Comment

    • #92
      Re: Dating non-armenians

      Originally posted by Sip
      If they want to preserve their identity and culture, then they should move back to Armenia.
      and if they want to marry foreigners, they should distance themselves from the Armenian name as far as possible.

      I mean, why even bother coming to an Armenian forum? do what you want to do, why are you sharing you're problems with us?

      are you that insecure? can't stand on your own 2 feet? can't make up your own mind? PATHETIC.... as I've said, a lost soul...

      do what you you want, but know that the core majority of the Armenians will not accept it and you will be viewed as a disgrace, and that, SIP, is coming from a second generation Armenian American.

      My family has been able to preserve our Armenian language and culture, and at the same time I am also an American culturally.

      Thus, while the ONLY SURE WAY TO PROTECT ARMENIAN CULTURE AND LANGUAGE IS BY LIVING ON ARMENIAN SOIL, that doesn't mean I can't be a good Armenian on a foreign soil.

      But as the saying goes, "he who does not respect his own roots cannot be a good citizen of any coutry".
      Last edited by Federation; 07-05-2006, 12:03 PM.

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      • #93
        Re: Dating non-armenians

        Originally posted by Federation
        and if they want to marry foreigners, they should distance themselves from the Armenian name as far as possible.
        I HIGHLY doubt you are in any sort of position to tell anyone what they can call themselves.

        Originally posted by Federation
        My family has been able to preserve our Armenian language and culture, and at the same time I am also an American culturally.
        What does that even mean? You are quick to put down others and call them pathetic yet you admit you are also an "American". WTF?
        this post = teh win.

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        • #94
          Re: Dating non-armenians

          Originally posted by odyssey167
          I don't know how to deal with them anymore, it's been alittle better lately, but there is still the tension. Will they ever get over it and accept her? Or will they remain as stubborn as they were? I know I'm not going to yield to them because they are wrong, and I won't be living a life where I am constantly dictated by rules that state how to be a "proper armenian." I think i have priority over my own rights and individuality.
          You're rebelling too late. If you had started to rebel when you were five, you might not have the problems with your parents that you have today.

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          • #95
            Re: Dating non-armenians

            Look at yourself. You just said that if Armenians want to preserve their culture they should head back to Armenia. I don't know if you realize it, but that was an all out insult against the Armenian people.

            If you told J--e--w-s to go back to Israel to preserve their cultural and religious traditions that would qualify as anti-semitism.

            HIGHLY doubt you are in any sort of position to tell anyone what they can call themselves
            ever heard of something called public opinion

            What does that even mean? You are quick to put down others and call them pathetic yet you admit you are also an "American". WTF?
            I'd recommend that you go back to night school and improve on your reading comprehension skills.

            What it means is that in the same fashion that J--ews can be Americans yet preserve all of their cultural and religious traditions, and work within foreign states to advance Israel's interests, so too can Armenians live on foreign lands and preserve their culture and advance their nation's interests.

            And in case you weren't aware, the vast majority of Je-ws renounce intermarriage and view down upon the gentile(non-je---w).

            The reason why je--ws are a strong, united and powerful people is because they have been able to preserve their culture throughout the ages in different countries.

            LEARN FROM THEM.
            Last edited by Federation; 07-05-2006, 12:51 PM.

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            • #96
              Re: Dating non-armenians

              If it's Armenians like you who should be preserving our sacred culture, then it's better off extinct.

              Comment

              • #97
                Re: Dating non-armenians

                Originally posted by tunot
                If it's Armenians like you who should be preserving our sacred culture, then it's better off extinct.
                that's an empty remark. Please be specific.

                Comment

                • #98
                  Re: Dating non-armenians

                  I thought I was clear about my problem with your posts Federation. But I guess you didn't get it. You say you are "preserving your Armenian culture" yet you say you are also American. Those two can't be. Obviously you are creating a new cutlure which is a mix of two.

                  I will say again: If you want to preserve your Armenian culture, go back to Armenia. But ANYWHERE else, you will have no choice but to make compromises.

                  As far as the rest of your insults, I fail to see how they have any bearing on the discussion. But if they make you feel better, go for it. Spew more of them out if it somehow makes you feel more "Armenian".
                  this post = teh win.

                  Comment

                  • #99
                    Re: Dating non-armenians

                    If J.ews have taught us one thing is that they can't maintain their own country. I don't see that as an example we should follow. I also don't see why our diaspora seems more important to some than our homeland.

                    Comment

                    • #100
                      Re: Dating non-armenians

                      Originally posted by Sip
                      I thought I was clear about my problem with your posts Federation. But I guess you didn't get it. You say you are "preserving your Armenian culture" yet you say you are also American. Those two can't be. Obviously you are creating a new cutlure which is a mix of two.

                      I will say again: If you want to preserve your Armenian culture, go back to Armenia. But ANYWHERE else, you will have no choice but to make compromises.

                      As far as the rest of your insults, I fail to see how they have any bearing on the discussion. But if they make you feel better, go for it. Spew more of them out if it somehow makes you feel more "Armenian".
                      WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??

                      perhaps bold works better for you:

                      I'd recommend that you go back to night school and improve on your reading comprehension skills.

                      What it means is that in the same fashion that J--ews can be Americans yet preserve all of their cultural and religious traditions, and work within foreign states to advance Israel's interests, so too can Armenians live on foreign lands and preserve their culture and advance their nation's interests.

                      And in case you weren't aware, the vast majority of Je-ws renounce intermarriage and view down upon the gentile(non-je---w).

                      The reason why je--ws are a strong, united and powerful people is because they have been able to preserve their culture throughout the ages in different countries.

                      LEARN FROM THEM.

                      Comment

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