Re: Presidential elections 2008 in Armenia
I wasn't sure where I wanted this piece by our CIA operative in Armenia. I thought since I already have several posts about Armenianow in this thread this would be a good place to post it. Anyway, here we see agent John "the horse face" Hughes finally addressing, albeit in general terms, the serious corruption that exists in the US government. Is this a sincere critique of his bosses in Washington DC or is it simply a clever way to reply to accusation about him being a foreign agent in Armenia??? Regardless of his intentions, we Armenians have been around for over four thousand five hundred years, we'll continue being around long after the US retires to the pages of ancient history. John Hughes should stop worrying about our internal problems and instead open an "investigative journalism" office in Washington DC called "AmericaNow".
Nonetheless, the article is interesting to read.
Armenian
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As the Placebo President, George Woops Bush, winds down the great American nightmare that started with an election he didn’t win and concludes with the whole world losing, his administration continues to the end to miss opportunities. Having lost the War on Terror, Washington is hardly doing any better fighting the War on Error that can’t be bought off for even $700 billion. You’d think Yerevan is far enough outside the D.C. Beltway to be spared the shrapnel of an imploding empire built on greed and deception. But no. My Erebuni beer (the “Official Beer of ArmeniaNow”, should market distributors be reading) now costs 350 drams – nearly 30 percent more than three years ago – and I’m not blaming beer-making oligarch parliamentarian arm wrestler Gagik Tsarukyan. No sir, I’m dropping the mug at W’s doorstep.
Isolated in nearly every way from the rest of the real world, lonely little Armenia some how pops up on the radar when it comes to being penalized for others’ mistakes. (Remember petrol lines when the clown in Georgia crossed the bear in Russia this August?) Like in the US, here we’ve had men in office who got there by illegitimate means. But at least Serzh Sargsyan and Robert Kocharyan have turned out double-digit growth while Gevorg Bushyan and Tigran Cheneyan flushed their country down Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac’s toilet. To digress: If a country’s financial liability rests on the performance of institutions with names that sound like cartoon characters, couldn’t even someone as vacant as “the Decider” see a crack in the foundation?
Anyway. I suppose all of us in ear-shot of CNN have heard Wall Street’s Humpty Dumpty impersonation played out to the “Brother Can You Spare a Dime” tune of $700 billion. And if you share my curiosity, we try to comprehend: What would that many dollars – 700,000,000,000 buy? That’s 210,000,000,000,000 drams. I don’t even know what to call that number, so I call it 600 billion Erebunis. At the current average rate (per square meter of land), Fanny and Freddie could have bought the entire expanse of Armenia, and had approximately $20 billion left. $700 billion is $233,333 for each person “officially” claimed in the Armenian population. During the latest presidential election here, it would have bought 42 billion votes (President Serzh needed only 862 thousand).
Laid end-to-end, the number of kebabs you could buy with $700 billion would reach 79,545,454 miles – from Proshian Street to Mars, with 369 million kebabs left over – give or take a couple. The amount would buy 700 million one-way tickets to Glendale. The Republic of Armenia Government could run for 35 years at its current budget on $700 billion. And at one a day (like the doctor recommends), I could have Erebuni until I am 1,643,835,616 years old. Unless the price goes up again. That’s why I’m voting democrat. I knew if I stayed here long enough, I could find a way that even I could vote for change in Armenia.
Source: http://www.armenianow.com/?action=vi...D=1204&lng=eng
I wasn't sure where I wanted this piece by our CIA operative in Armenia. I thought since I already have several posts about Armenianow in this thread this would be a good place to post it. Anyway, here we see agent John "the horse face" Hughes finally addressing, albeit in general terms, the serious corruption that exists in the US government. Is this a sincere critique of his bosses in Washington DC or is it simply a clever way to reply to accusation about him being a foreign agent in Armenia??? Regardless of his intentions, we Armenians have been around for over four thousand five hundred years, we'll continue being around long after the US retires to the pages of ancient history. John Hughes should stop worrying about our internal problems and instead open an "investigative journalism" office in Washington DC called "AmericaNow".
Nonetheless, the article is interesting to read.
Armenian
**************************
Drink to Change: 1,643,835,616 reasons why I’m voting for Obama
As the Placebo President, George Woops Bush, winds down the great American nightmare that started with an election he didn’t win and concludes with the whole world losing, his administration continues to the end to miss opportunities. Having lost the War on Terror, Washington is hardly doing any better fighting the War on Error that can’t be bought off for even $700 billion. You’d think Yerevan is far enough outside the D.C. Beltway to be spared the shrapnel of an imploding empire built on greed and deception. But no. My Erebuni beer (the “Official Beer of ArmeniaNow”, should market distributors be reading) now costs 350 drams – nearly 30 percent more than three years ago – and I’m not blaming beer-making oligarch parliamentarian arm wrestler Gagik Tsarukyan. No sir, I’m dropping the mug at W’s doorstep.
Isolated in nearly every way from the rest of the real world, lonely little Armenia some how pops up on the radar when it comes to being penalized for others’ mistakes. (Remember petrol lines when the clown in Georgia crossed the bear in Russia this August?) Like in the US, here we’ve had men in office who got there by illegitimate means. But at least Serzh Sargsyan and Robert Kocharyan have turned out double-digit growth while Gevorg Bushyan and Tigran Cheneyan flushed their country down Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac’s toilet. To digress: If a country’s financial liability rests on the performance of institutions with names that sound like cartoon characters, couldn’t even someone as vacant as “the Decider” see a crack in the foundation?
Anyway. I suppose all of us in ear-shot of CNN have heard Wall Street’s Humpty Dumpty impersonation played out to the “Brother Can You Spare a Dime” tune of $700 billion. And if you share my curiosity, we try to comprehend: What would that many dollars – 700,000,000,000 buy? That’s 210,000,000,000,000 drams. I don’t even know what to call that number, so I call it 600 billion Erebunis. At the current average rate (per square meter of land), Fanny and Freddie could have bought the entire expanse of Armenia, and had approximately $20 billion left. $700 billion is $233,333 for each person “officially” claimed in the Armenian population. During the latest presidential election here, it would have bought 42 billion votes (President Serzh needed only 862 thousand).
Laid end-to-end, the number of kebabs you could buy with $700 billion would reach 79,545,454 miles – from Proshian Street to Mars, with 369 million kebabs left over – give or take a couple. The amount would buy 700 million one-way tickets to Glendale. The Republic of Armenia Government could run for 35 years at its current budget on $700 billion. And at one a day (like the doctor recommends), I could have Erebuni until I am 1,643,835,616 years old. Unless the price goes up again. That’s why I’m voting democrat. I knew if I stayed here long enough, I could find a way that even I could vote for change in Armenia.
Source: http://www.armenianow.com/?action=vi...D=1204&lng=eng
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