Alright to be shy?

[HyeJinx1984]

...if only

*Groans* Ugh you SO are the new Jinx....

[!EEK]

*Groans* Ugh you SO are the new Jinx....

Don't think so... If we made a poll, I'm sure you'd still be our beloved Drama Queen....I would maybe be the princess...

[HyeJinx1984]

This is so gay

[violette829]

Violette's approach is American I think.
I noticed it when I moved out here.
hold on let me not generalize. it's not the American, but the "LA" approach.
since most of you were either born here or came here when you were pretty young, I think the fact that I moved here at 18 makes me sort of "credible" to come to this conclusion so to speak.
people in LA have this self-image issue. EVERYONE not necessarily thinks, but definitely PORTRAYS themselves as being the best. I think that's why we don't have as many shy people here. I would say it has its good and bad sides. it's good in the sense that -it feels pretty good and it effects your performance, walking to that interview thinking you're AS eligible to get that certain job as any of the other applicants. it's optimism. but a fake one. and that's where the bad side kicks in. deep down you're really struggling to convince yourself that you can get the job EVEN though you don't have the experience and/or the education for it. but you're keeping that image of confidence. you're lookin good to your surroundings and that's all that matters to you. unfortunately.
this was a culture shock to me.
I was raised to be a realist. and Los Angeles and its "suburbs" are definitely not that.
I just thought that since the guy's from belgium, where people are "sincerer" in their relationships (if you will), at least I think so, lets not teach the guy the nasty LA ways for dealing with people. yes...people's "confidences" here are more like egos to me. it's as if I feel like telling them
"hello, hey you UP there(or THINKING you're up there), could you come down a little please??"
so EEK, bottomline is just be yourself, if yourself is telling you that youre too shy and you wanna train yourself to be more outspoken then go ahead get some of the tips from this dense thread and work on it, but don't start by going around telling yourself "I'm the best" (as some of our members have suggested you do), if you don't feel you are.

Thank you for calling me fake by the way...Hmm..What the hell are you talking about? In your life, if you walk around wondering how good you are, or spend it trying to prove yourself to people, WHERE WILL YOU END UP? A nervous butthole. By saying that "you're the best", it doesn't mean that I'm the best marathon runner, or the best musician. No matter how good you are, there's always someone who will be better. "The best" doesn't mean what you do, it's who you are. It's not a sports competition, it's a life competition, sort of like what lose said. There is nothing more fascinating than how a person can make his/herself feel. It's amazing the things you can accomplish, just by being a more confident, and aggresive person. You can't just sit at home, cross your fingers, and hope your shyness will go away. You gotta do something about it. Get up, go out, and enjoy life. That's it.


As far as being raised in LA, I'm sorry but it has NOTHING to do with where I was raised and has everything to do with who I was raised by. My family, even in Iran and Armenia, have always made a conscious effort to praise eachother and to make sure that we all value ourselves to the fullest.

I'm going on and on, and I'm sorry if I sound like a bi+ch, but you've offended me. And we ALL know what happens when you do that. LOL

[!EEK]

It hurts when she is angry

[sSsflamesSs]

Don't think so... If we made a poll, I'm sure you'd still be our beloved Drama Queen....I would maybe be the princess...

AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! This made my morning!

[loseyourname]

Yeah maybe lack of confidence....I'm kinda "affraid"(it 's a word a bit too strong) of other people's reaction..

Well, there's your problem right there. You're putting too much stock in other people. Chances are, most people you meet will forget you two minutes later. You shouldn't be concerned with what they think of you. If you're a kind-hearted person with good intentions, any reasonable woman will recognize this and think very highly of you. Really, you just need to think highly of yourself. So what if meeting new people is awkward to you? It's awkward to a lot of them, too. Chances are, they are just as concerned with how they are coming across, and are too wary of their own actions to be judging yours. The real key is that you can't be afraid of falling flat on your face. I say a lot of really insulting things to people I just meet without even realizing it and sometimes piss them off, but you know what? I just keep going, and most people I strike up a conversation with don't seem to regret it. It isn't that big of a deal to make a mistake.

[!EEK]

SO, maybe you should tell me what you tell them...

Any ice breaking sayings?

[sSsflamesSs]

Chances are, they are just as concerned with how they are coming across, and are too wary of their own actions to be judging yours.

Pay close attention to this quote, !EEK.

It's rather ironic that the people who are the shyest also have the strongest sense that the world is revolving around them (for lack of a better phraise) and everyone is looking at them, etc. (I'm not in any way attacking you !EEK; we're all like this to some degree).

[sSsflamesSs]

Who deleted my tutu?