Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

[KanadaHye]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

This premis that premarital sex for a women means that she is a xxxxx is and idiotic assumtion. Having sex does not make you goood or bad. You can have sex with multiple partners and still be a great person (man or woman). Having sex should not be looked upon as disrespecting ones self because it is very much a part of being a human being. Women do not get marries at 14 years of age anymore like they did in the past thus many of the morals relating to premerital sex are out of context and irrelivent today. Depriving yourself and others from one of the things that makes life worth living seems like a stupid idea to me especialy when it can be done in a safe and healthy manner.

Right.... keep telling yourself that while some of my friends are recovering from divorce because their great and respectful wives took them to the cleaners while shacking up with losers while their hubbies were busy making money. Of course their complaints were "you're always working and I have needs" but I'll take your money and screw who ever I want. LOL.

[Siggie]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

Right.... keep telling yourself that while some of my friends are recovering from divorce because their great and respectful wives took them to the cleaners while shacking up with losers while their hubbies were busy making money. Of course their complaints were "you're always working and I have needs" but I'll take your money and screw who ever I want. LOL.

People suck! There are men who are terrible human beings and there are women who are terrible human beings. You're hearing the story from your male friends and we're not naive enough to think we tell stories without trying to cast ourselves in more positive light. I think the women have different stories about why their marriages failed and I wouldn't believe them either. The truth probably lies somewhere between.
A virgin prior to marriage could do what you described as well. I would take this more as a lesson to choose our partners carefully.

[levon]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

People suck! There are men who are terrible human beings and there are women who are terrible human beings. You're hearing the story from your male friends and we're not naive enough to think we tell stories without trying to cast ourselves in more positive light. I think the women have different stories about why their marriages failed and I wouldn't believe them either. The truth probably lies somewhere between.
A virgin prior to marriage could do what you described as well. I would take this more as a lesson to choose our partners carefully.

True, but nobody listens to a man's lies, a man can hardly take a woman to the cleaners, man are much more likely to be prosecuted for delinquent child support payments, and finally, nobody will jail a woman just because her husband claims she forced him to have sex with her.

A virgin is less likely to do all of the above. While virginity is not a guarantee, it is a much better indicator of faithfulness. A virgin saves herself for her husband, whereas a woman who isn't is essentially selling herself to the highest bidder.

[Siggie]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

A virgin is less likely to do all of the above. While virginity is not a guarantee, it is a much better indicator of faithfulness. A virgin saves herself for her husband, whereas a woman who isn't is essentially selling herself to the highest bidder.

If it's not seen as much of an option if one wants to get married (as I would assume, you'd like it to be become?) doesn't it lose its predictive power? Assuming, of course, that there's a relationship between the two. E.g. If most women will wait because it's expected of them, then whether they waited or not (not enough variability) loses its usefulness at predicting who will be faithful.

I wonder whether women who wed as virgins later feel doubt in assessing their sexual satisfaction. Will she wonder if it could be better? I would think it would be more of an issue with the women who aren't enjoying sex with their husbands. Will they wonder if it's their husbands? I think open dialogue about sex between the couple would help, but to the extent that one partner doesn't feel like they could even bring up the topic with their spouse, would they be more likely to stray, just to see if it could be improved?
My apologies for this not being well formulated, but I hope you all understand what I'm saying.
I don't have an opinion either way... just thought it's an interesting question that might be worth considering.

Also, I don't think it's so black and white. There's a big difference between a woman with 20 partners and one with 1 or 2 previous partners no? Is it fair to say that the woman who had a long term relationship and had sex with that partner prior is a promiscuous or "selling herself to the highest bidder"?

[KanadaHye]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

I wonder whether women who wed as virgins later feel doubt in assessing their sexual satisfaction. Will she wonder if it could be better? I would think it would be more of an issue with the women who aren't enjoying sex with their husbands. Will they wonder if it's their husbands? I think open dialogue about sex between the couple would help, but to the extent that one partner doesn't feel like they could even bring up the topic with their spouse, would they be more likely to stray, just to see if it could be improved?
My apologies for this not being well formulated, but I hope you all understand what I'm saying.

Most divorces are for money as most married guys I know are happy once a year, LOL.

[Siggie]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

Most divorces are for money as most married guys I know are happy once a year, LOL.

That's sad.
Maybe if it was good, there'd be more of it?
Really, baring some sort of medical condition or drug related side effect producing extremely low libido, I would think if it was enjoyable, both partners would want it more.

Seriously though... we were talking about the subset of divorces involving infidelity. What about in those cases?

[levon]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

If it's not seen as much of an option if one wants to get married (as I would assume, you'd like it to be become?) doesn't it lose its predictive power? Assuming, of course, that there's a relationship between the two. E.g. If most women will wait because it's expected of them, then whether they waited or not (not enough variability) loses its usefulness at predicting who will be faithful.

I'm not sure what you mean here, especially in the first sentence. Would you reword?

I wonder whether women who wed as virgins later feel doubt in assessing their sexual satisfaction. Will she wonder if it could be better? I would think it would be more of an issue with the women who aren't enjoying sex with their husbands. Will they wonder if it's their husbands? I think open dialogue about sex between the couple would help, but to the extent that one partner doesn't feel like they could even bring up the topic with their spouse, would they be more likely to stray, just to see if it could be improved?

While sex is important, it is not by any means the most important thing in marriage. It's a skill that can be learned and improved upon. There is a difference between not wanting to explore one's sexuality and waiting till marriage. For a woman, waiting indicates faithfulness to her future husband. If she is able to wait when she's free to do whatever she wants, then chances are higher that she will be faithful when she's married. Women who wed as virgins will be less likely to wonder about different partners than women who have mad many partners prior to being wed. There is no one to compare to, no measure of how good it can be. Plus, a lot of women enjoy sex the most when the feel sexy. Make a woman feel sexy and she'll enjoy it even when she's not enjoying it. There is a reason why every major religion expects women to be wed as virgins. In the end, women are free to do whatever they want, but they shouldn't expect men to accept them no matter what.

[Siggie]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

I'm not sure what you mean here, especially in the first sentence. Would you reword?

I mean if it becomes social convention that women should be virgins, then it would increase the proportion of virgins. The closer we get to "100% virgins," we lose variability right? I.e. all virgins = zero variability. As we approach 100%, the value of that variable (virginity) as a predictor of fidelity decreases. I'm talking stats... I thought you had stats background? Am I confusing you with someone else?

While sex is important, it is not by any means the most important thing in marriage. It's a skill that can be learned and improved upon. There is a difference between not wanting to explore one's sexuality and waiting till marriage. For a woman, waiting indicates faithfulness to her future husband. If she is able to wait when she's free to do whatever she wants, then chances are higher that she will be faithful when she's married. Women who wed as virgins will be less likely to wonder about different partners than women who have mad many partners prior to being wed. There is no one to compare to, no measure of how good it can be. Plus, a lot of women enjoy sex the most when the feel sexy. Make a woman feel sexy and she'll enjoy it even when she's not enjoying it. There is a reason why every major religion expects women to be wed as virgins. In the end, women are free to do whatever they want, but they shouldn't expect men to accept them no matter what.

That's just it though... I'm wondering if not having anyone to compare to would be what makes them wonder. If you've had other partners couldn't you be less likely to think about what you might be missing? I think it could cut either way. Which way it goes, I don't know... I doubt that there's research on this, but I haven't looked.
Could we say the same of men then? If they're willing to wait and not have sex before marriage, does that mean they will be more likely to be faithful? If not, what's the difference?

I think making your partner feel sexy is a good idea in general, but I think orgasm would be more important to satisfaction.

[levon]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

I mean if it becomes social convention that women should be virgins, then it would increase the proportion of virgins. The closer we get to "100% virgins," we lose variability right? I.e. all virgins = zero variability. As we approach 100%, the value of that variable (virginity) as a predictor of fidelity decreases. I'm talking stats... I thought you had stats background? Am I confusing you with someone else?

Nop, your wording didn't make any sense to me. I think if women or shunned into being virgins and being faithful then everything works out. And the shunning must come from other women. And I would say that infidelity is much lower in countries where women wed virgins. And yes, you're confusing me with mos.

That's just it though... I'm wondering if not having anyone to compare to would be what makes them wonder. If you've had other partners couldn't you be less likely to think about what you might be missing? I think it could cut either way. Which way it goes, I don't know... I doubt that there's research on this, but I haven't looked.
Could we say the same of men then? If they're willing to wait and not have sex before marriage, does that mean they will be more likely to be faithful? If not, what's the difference?

You are talking as if sex is the single most important thing in life. Any woman for whom that is true is not fit for marriage, period. Others don't spend much time wondering if their lives would be better if they were having sex with someone else.

Almost all women would admit, a virgin guy is just not attractive. Whether secretly, or openly most women want a man who's more experience than they are.

I think making your partner feel sexy is a good idea in general, but I think orgasm would be more important to satisfaction.

Women don't orgasm if they don't feel sexy.

[KanadaHye]

Re: Armenians and sex: what's your opinion?

Almost all women would admit, a virgin guy is just not attractive. Whether secretly, or openly most women want a man who's more experience than they are.

You think Bill Gates got around before he got hitched? lol I don't think natives have this issue... seems to be an immigrant thing as natives usually hook up at a young age.